Tag Archives: tweens

Mending Relationships

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Do you have a relationship that needs mending?

Sometimes we have fights in our house. I hate to break it to you guys, but my home is not always calm and peaceful (shocking, I know!). There have been many times when we have needed to mend relationships in our home.

I want to take us to James 4 today. The first part of James 4 says, “What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You want something but you don’t get it? You kill and covet but cannot have what you want, you quarrel and fight, you do not have because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive because you ask with the wrong motives that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.”

It’s interesting to me that the more I get to know the Lord, over and over again God says the same things throughout Scripture. He says, trust me, talk to me, put down your flesh, and dwell and live in the spirit.

If we continue to read in chapter 4:6, we read, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” God opposes the proud, and gives grace to the humble.

If you are in the process of needing to mend a relationship in your life today, be willing to seek forgiveness for your own actions. As parents, we need to be humble and not lording our position over our children. Humility opens a child’s heart. When I can go to my child and say, “You know what, I’m sorry, I could have done that better,” it’s amazing the response I will get, as opposed to saying, “You need to apologize to me.”

Several years ago, I had an instance with one of my daughters- a hardness of heart- and I was having a hard time getting through. I asked the Lord to give me a specific grace for this particular child, and I felt like the Lord was telling me, “Tell her that you need her grace for you. Ask her to pray for you.” I went into her room and I was tucking her in bed for the evening and we said our prayers together, I said to her, “You know what sweetheart? Mom is struggling with these things…” I could almost see her heart begin to soften as I told her some things in my own life (like pride and fear) that I was struggling with. It was almost as if my willingness to expose a tender part of my heart made her hear tender towards me.

So if you have the opportunity to, seek forgiveness from your children if you need to. Children want to forgive their parents. Wait for the Lord to speak to your child and then wait for your child to respond to you verbally.

Try it out. See if it does work. God says that forgiveness clears the conscious. Take the time to mend your relationship with your children.

Keepin’ it real, Moms!

Indoor Nature Study on Apples

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I’m going to let you in on a little secret: I don’t like to be outside. I love to be indoors where there’s no critters that attack you and leave you covered in itchy red bumps. I don’t like to be outside, but God gave me to boys that LOVE the outdoors. This year I committed to doing more nature studies and nature walks with my guys. The calendar may see that it’s Fall but where I live it’s still Summer. It can be too hot to be outside so I’ve started doing some nature studies with my boys indoors.

When I think of fall I think of the leaves changing and pumpkins and apples. I thought it would be fun to do a quick nature study with my boys about apples. They are one of our favorite fruits so it was fun to learn about how they grow. I started off with a short story called “How the Apple Blossom Came Back” from Outdoor Secrets. I also asked both my boys for a narration and then we headed to the table for some hands on fun!

Our short story explained to us that you can find a blossom on the inside of an apple. I never realized this because I typically cut our apples the other way. My boys were very excited to see the blossom in the center of the apple once it was sliced. The trick is to cut the apple from side to side and not top to bottom.

I had one more activity for my boys before I was going to let them eat their apples: apple stamping. This is the first year that we have been keeping nature journals and I love them. My plan was to have them stamp the apples on a page so that we could still see the blossom in the center. It didn’t work out that well but they still had a lot of fun. Also both my boys wrote short poems that I copied at the bottom of their pages.

While my boys enjoyed apples for a snack we read some books about apples and apple trees. I wish that we had an apple orchard to visit, but we grow citrus where we live. We spend some time reading books about apples, orchards and farms. I even threw in some fun picture books and stories about Johnny Appleseed. I found some pictures of apple orchards and blossoms online and we had fun looking at the beautiful pictures. Here are some of the books that we enjoyed:

How Do Apples Grow by Betsy Maestro
Johnny Appleseed by Reeve Lindbergh
Apples, Apples, Apples by Nancy Elizabeth Wallace
Life on an Apple Orchard by Judy Wolfman
A Tree is a Plant by Clyde Robert Bulla

We have actually gone on ~~a few~~ one nature walk so far this school year. But we have done several indoor nature studies. My boys found a frog by our front door and we spent some time looking up different frog species. We were able to identify our little friend and my oldest son even drew pictures of the life cycle of the frog.

What about you? Do you get outside and explore God’s creation with your children? Do you have a favorite indoor study that you’ve done? I’d love some more ideas.

Fall Skin & Hair Care

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Don’t you just love fall? The leaves are changing, and the cool weather is slowly making its way in. As much as we will miss those fun pool days, and long sunny days – we are excited to welcome this new season. There is so much excitement in decorating our homes, pulling out the cooler-weather clothes, and digging through all our favorite pumpkin recipes!

(This post contains affiliate links. See my disclosure page for details.)

But with the new season and cooler weather, we also get drier hair and drier skin. Taking a little extra time to care of your skin can be the difference between healthy skin and flaky cracked skin. And keeping our hair moisturized throughout the cooler months can make the difference between hydrated healthy hair and dry, brittle hair.

I picked out my must have items that help me keep my hair healthy and my skin nourished throughout these cooler and drier months.

Hair care must haves:

Neutrogena Triple Moisture Hair Mask. Ever deep condition your hair, just to finish with what feels like hair that needs to be washed again? If you have, you know how frustrating that is. This deep conditioner doesn’t do that. It is incredibly hydrating, doesn’t weigh down your hair, and keeps hair healthy and soft. A small amount goes a long way too, don’t be fooled by the size of the jar. This jar usually lasts several months.

L’oreal Nourishing EverCreme Leave-In Spray. This is my go to extra care protection product, especially if I’m going to be outside in the cooler weather. It is incredibly lightweight, which is a big deal for me as I don’t like to feel products on my hair.

Face care must haves:

I’m very picky with what I put on my face. Most products take my skin to one extreme or the other. The only product I’ve found that nourishes my skin, keeps it clean, and controls break out – is Cetaphil. I use both the cleanser and lotion. Cetaphil is very gentle, yet effective.

Cetaphil Cleanser. I use this all year long. I love that it’s mild, non-irritating, non-greasy, and rinses of easily.

Cetaphil Lotion. I don’t use this as much during the warmer months, just in the drier areas of my face. But in the cooler months, my skin need it more. Best part? Its fragrance free, non-greasy, and hydrates all day long.

Vaseline Lip Therapy. Last fall my lips started to dry out a lot, and I was constantly applying chap stick but wasn’t getting any relief. I went to the store and grabbed tons of different lip products, but nothing worked. Until I tired Vaseline Lip Therapy. It is by far the best lip product I’ve tried. I apply it about twice a day, and that’s sufficient to keep my lips from cracking and drying out. I bought this last winter and still have more than half of it.

Sun Screen. Sun Screen? Yup! Even though those long sunny summer days are in the rear view mirror, it is still important to use sun screen. I use one of two things: a BB cream which contains SPF protection or an oil free sport SPF sunscreen.

Body care must haves:

Dove Go Fresh Body Wash. I recently switched to this body wash and love it! It smells SO good. Funny how the small things like great smelling body wash can be relaxing – especially after a long day of mommy duties. I really like how it hydrates and restores my skin.

St. Ives Body Lotion. This is one of the non-body-butter lotions that really keeps my skin hydrated. They say you should switch from lotion to cream in the cooler months, but this one works well. It doesn’t feel oily and doesn’t leave a residue. Perfect for a busy moms day to day moisturizing needs.

Extracts Brazil Nut Body Butter. I use this body butter about once a week. Usually right after I exfoliate. Much like the hair mask I mentioned above, you don’t need to use a lot, a little goes a long way. Most body butters that I’ve tried leave me feeling greasy and like I can’t touch anything, this one doesn’t. It is paraben-free and sulphate-free

Pacifica Body Butter. I carry this one around in my purse, and apply it as needed throughout the day – usually on my hands and arms. It’s 100% Vegan, made with Shea and Mango butters, almond oil and safflower oil. It’s also paraben –free.

Bath & Shower Gloves. This really isn’t really a product, but it’s a must have for me. It’s a great way to exfoliate, even if you don’t have a scrub. This will help keep you skin even toned and eliminate dry patches too.

I would LOVE to know what your favorite fall/dry weather beauty products are. And if you try any of these out, let me know what you think about them!

Just for Fun (And Learning)

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Life is never as easy as Pinterest makes it look, is it?

I saw this post today and thought: “Oh! I’ll make that! Easy-peasy.” Well, like most things, it took some determination and some conversation and some adjusting … wait … that’s what ALL good things require!

So, if you’re looking for something fun that you can do with your kids (notice I did not say healthy, I said fun) then give this a try. We did it a few times before finally figuring out what made it look cool.

Turns out, there really is a “science” to it!

Have fun!

STEP ONE: Pour fruit juice over ice. Sorry, but it has to be the sugary kind. That pesky “good for you” stuff won’t work for this treat. The sugar weighs more. So it needs to be sugary to stay on the bottom of the cup.

STEP 2: Use a spoon to diffuse the blue drink (we found, after three tries, that a mixture of Gatorade, water and one drop of blue food coloring for show worked best) to carefully add the second layer to your drink.

STEP THREE: Same thing—carefully pour the diet whatever (we used Sprite Zero) on the top. Go slow!

STEP FOUR: Enjoy! You did it! Be sure to talk to your kids about “why” this works 🙂

Happy Independence Day! God Bless America!

Have Fun With Your Kids,

Precious Priority: Family Mealtimes

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Ahhhhhhh—Thanksgiving. It reminds me of a simpler time.

I love Thanksgiving because it’s the one time of year that beckons us home, but without the pressure and expectations of gifts.

The memories without the mayhem, if you will.

I tell my children of my love for Thanksgiving and they remind me that they love mealtime at our house. Not just the fancy meals, either. Their appreciation comes from a certainty that at the end of the day, we’re together. Candles lit. Music playing.

Toddler fussing.

Milk spilling.

Teenagers talking.

Daddy praying.

Mealtime.

We live in a culture that has largely forgotten the power of a shared meal. There is something missing when we rush from one hurried day to the next. We think we’re saving time to rush through the drive-thru again. But really, we’re not saving anything. Days turn to weeks. Weeks to months. Months to years.

Where we spend our time is a window into our hearts: it’s an indicator of where our hearts are.

“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:21

For me, Thanksgiving is a reminder of how fast my life is going by. Each holiday that passes I know I am another year closer to a quiet house. Mealtimes are markers for me. I think just last year, I had a babe inside me and a preschooler vying for my attention as I muddled my way through learning how to use my slow cooker. Mmmmm. No, that was not last year. That was nearly twenty years ago. Can we really s l o w d o w n?

Mealtimes beckon.

Time is passing. That’s probably the real message my heart receives as I plan Thanksgiving dinner. Again.

I ask myself, “Where are your priorities? What is truly precious in this life?”

And in my heart, I know the answer. The best memories we share will never be found in the drive-thru of life.

The best memories are more of a “sit down” affair. An affair of the heart. An investment. An open-door, company-for-dinner, home cooked investment.

Doesn’t have to be perfect. Mac-n-cheese at the table is just as beautiful to your children as filet mignon 🙂 It’s not about the food. It’s about the priority.

If you’re looking for a place to start making an investment into the heart of your family, the dinner table is a very, very good place to start.

The Importance of Discipline

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Your child depends on your loving correction!

Several years ago, a friend of mine pulled me aside and pointed out a character flaw in one of my children. Apparently this child was not only being disrespectful to another adult, but rude as well. It hurt to hear this from my friend. It stung. I was mad—and a little embarrassed too. But you know what? She was right. I needed to address the problem, and not allow my child to hide behind me.

That meant apologizing to the adult and asking for forgiveness. It’s amazing the peace that follows conflict when it is addressed and corrected.

Are you disciplining your children? A loving mother will lovingly discipline her children. As parents we must remember that much of the responsibility our children’s behavior rests with us.

There are consequences to refusing to address character issues in the lives of our children. Ask the Lord to give you a discerning heart so that you can see what the real issue is and then follow-through with your child. He’ll thank you later.

Heidi St. John

Speaking the Truth in Love