Tag Archives: printables

Scheduling: Three Tips to Prioritizing Your Day

I_choose_tipsYears ago, I came up with three priorities to help me decide where I would invest the time I had each day.  Today, I use it as a guideline of sorts—a determiner that helps me choose how I will prioritize the time God gives me each day.

With 10 people in our busy household each day, the fact is: I either have a plan or I don’t.  If I don’t, chances are good that the day will run me over and leave me on the side of the road for dead.

And we can’t have that.

I am also a fan of something I call “training wheel” schedules.  That means that I start out our year with a schedule with the understanding that the job of the schedule is to help me get through the day, not to dictate my day for me.  [THIS WAS A HARD-LEARNED LESSON.]

Here are my three priorities each day:

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Now, I know that some of you can’t fathom “scheduling” something like time in the Bible, but for me, well, let’s just say it is the gas in my little Mom Car.  I need it.  As mothers, we are constantly pouring out into the lives of our children and families.  We need to recharge our batteries. For me, this means rising early (something that I don’t believe is a biblical mandate but I highly recommend it), getting dressed in my workout clothes and spending a few minutes of solitude with the Lord.

Were there seasons when this was impossible, or at least unlikely?  You know it!  After seven babies, I can assure you, there have been times when I was lucky to get OUT of bed at all, let alone get up early—but now, with our youngest at 2 and 1/2, I I have found that if I’m self-disciplined, I can do it. Most mornings, I struggle to wake up … but being up early is a gift.  The house is quiet. I can think. Pray. Breathe.  It makes a huge difference in my life, those precious few moments of quiet each morning.

I_choose2I can’t stress this enough: good marriages require nurturing.  A good marriage is like the “glue” that holds the family tightly bound together.  I know this is not always popular but at the end of the day (pun intended), your marriage is the priority relationship in your home.  Nurture it.  Protect it.  Enjoy it.

Honestly, this is an entirely separate post—I’ve written about this before—and I will again; because it’s just.that.important. Don’t sacrifice your marriage on the altar of good parenting. Your kids need your marriage to succeed as much as the two of you do.

I_choose3This is the “big one,” the one that everyone really wants to talk about.   I know it sounds boring and stuffy to some people, but here’s the truth:  iSchedule. Scheduling has saved my bacon on more than one occasion.  On days when I feel to tired to think straight, out comes the schedule—and the kids know exactly what they are supposed to be doing without me telling them over and over … and over.

On other days, we might have time and energy for some spontaneous unscheduling and I’ll ditch the schedule altogether in favor of reading longer with the children or catching my husband for an impromptu lunch date.  Either way, that schedule is there to help keep us moving in the direction we want to go.

Having a system or schedule in place allows my mind to let go of things that would otherwise drive me completely out onto a limb, such as handwriting practice or memory work.  If I have it on the schedule, I know it’s going to get done.

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Here’s the key to successful scheduling though: there’s not one right way to do it. You’ve got to give yourself freedom to try new things. Your schedule should be as unique as your family is.  One season it will work for you, and the next it may not.  That, as they say, “is life.”

I make my schedules using TABLES on my computer.  It takes some time to figure out the best way to do it—so give yourself time to play with it.  I also use planners and I’m a journaling junkie—so much so, that a few years ago, I released a journal just for busy moms like me.

The form you see above available in a editable version, too.  If you dare—download it and tweak it for your family.  Customize it!  Make it your own. You can do it!  Remember: the schedule is supposed to help you; not rule you.

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At the end of the day, busy mom, only  YOU can manage your days well.  Be intentional about your time.  See your time as a commodity—something you need to spend wisely.

Schedule—with the harvest in mind,
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Want to see more? You can find all my books, as well as CD’s MP3’s and other great things for busy moms here:

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Heidi St John Guide to Daylight

10 Things I Ask Myself

Dear Busy Mom,

Some of you have heard me talk about all my … well, my mothering mistakes.  Pretty much, I’ve made a bunch of them. I’ve yelled, been impatient, rude and even unkind at times. I’ve looked at myself in the mirror and marveled that God has entrusted me (me!) with the wondrous responsibility of shepherding small hearts.

Maybe you can relate.

I wrote this list in my journal some years ago to help me “plant with the harvest in mind.”  You see, motherhood drives me to my knees–all the time.

It’s been said that there are “no perfect mothers … but a million ways to be a good mom.”

Keep trying, busy mom.  You don’t have to be perfect.  There are no perfect moms, but there sure are a lot of great ones.

Here’s my list–I hope it encourages you.

Keep growing,
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Heidi St John Guide to Daylight

Heidi St John Firmly Planted Family Devotional For All Ages

Marriage {Before} Mothering

Dear Heidi,

My husband is upset with me. We rarely talk anymore, except to discuss finances or other “necessary” things.  He is a good father and a wonderful man. I’m trying to be a good mother and wife, but my husband says he feels neglected. I honestly can’t help it! I’m too tired at the end of the day for sex most days—and even though I try to explain how much energy it takes to parent our four children and keep the house in decent order, he doesn’t get it. I know we feel more like roommates than lovers these days. But I don’t know what to do about it. Maybe I’m wrong, but I really think my kids need my energy right now.  After they are grown, my husband and I will have all the time we want together.  My priority is our kids while they are little. How can I talk to my husband to help him understand this?”

You know, I get many letters like this each week. And I get it. Motherhood is demanding. It’s often 24/7, diapers, dishes and discipline. It’s enough to bring a woman to her breaking point. That’s part of the reason I’m so passionate about moms encouraging other moms.  We need each other! Only a mother can truly understand the demands and pressures of another mother.

But here’s the thing: we can’t let motherhood rob us of one of life’s greatest blessings—and that’s a healthy marriage.  I’ve often said that I believe the marriage comes before mothering. I’ve taken some heat for it, because some take that to mean that I don’t care about the kids.  This is not the case. Here’s why:

The marriage is the primary relationship at home. Many moms believe that their children should come first; after all their husbands are grownups! I understand the reasoning behind this, but I believe it’s based in a misunderstanding of God’s design for marriage.

The intent of the mom who puts her children before her marriage is noble, but it lacks vision for the greater picture of a truly healthy family.

Have you ever heard a flight attendant as she instructs passengers before take off? She’ll say something like, “In the unlikely event of a loss of cabin pressure, SECURE YOUR MASK FIRST BEFORE ASSISTING YOUNGER PASSENGERS.” This is because everyone knows that if the parents pass out from lack of oxygen, the child is rendered defenseless in most cases.

 

Your marriage is a lot like this situation. Think of nurturing your marriage in the same way you might think of securing an oxygen mask to yourself and your husband. Breathe life into your marriage every day. Keep your marriage physically and emotionally healthy.

If we create a child-centered home to the neglect of our marriage and the marriage falls apart, or if we only give the marriage 50% of the oxygen it needs, the marriage will suffer. And the children of that marriage will suffer too.

So yes, love your children fiercely. Teach them. Discipline and train them. Nurture them.

But love your spouse FIRST. Your spouse should get the best part of you. Healthy relationships with our children flow out of healthy, thriving marriages. The best thing a busy mom can do for her children is to love their father.

Precious mom, take time to recharge your inner batteries.  You need to have something left for your husband at the end of the day. Give yourself an hour of quiet time each day to shower, read, nap, or tidy up (if that’s what relaxes your heart and mind). I’ve been doing “quiet time” for years.  Quiet time just means that the kids are either reading in their rooms or napping, or watching a movie quietly. The point is: do what you need to do to refresh your spirit.  The days of mothering are long but the years go by fast.  Be sure your marriage is thriving when your nest is empty.

The investment you make in your marriage today pay dividends far into the future. Your marriage is worth investing in!

Heidi St John Guide to Romance

Heidi St John Firmly Planted Family Devotional For All Ages

Sample Daily Checklist

I like to make individual checklists of everyday assignments for our kids. I plan six months at a time if I can. It takes me two days to make these checklists for each of our kids. I’ve attached a page from last year.

Notice that I have a special time set aside for each child to go over their assignments. 🙂 The checklist is meant to help them know what is expected of them each week. And no. We don’t always get it all done. But we try. 😀

 

Heidi St John Guide to Daylight