Tag Archives: counter-culture

Don’t Turn Away: Trouble in the Homeschool Movement

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Oops. It happened again.

Another “pillar” of the homeschool movement has resigned after allegations of sexual misconduct and inappropriate behavior.

“In allegations going back decades, Gothard, 79, and unmarried, is said to have specifically targeted young women and teen girls to perform administrative duties for him at IBLP’s headquarters, where he eventually would make unwanted and inappropriate physical contact while also manipulating them emotionally.” (Christian Post.com)

This comes just months after a scandal at Vision Forum forced the resignation of Doug Phillips. Of course, I’m troubled by this. But what’s more troubling to me is the lack of concern that the homeschool community seems to have for the victims of Gothard’s and Phillips teachings. There seems to be more concern for protecting these men and their “ministries” because it may have a negative impact on homeschooling than for the lives of the people who have been hurt and abused.

What in the world are we thinking?

I’d like to make something very clear: Bill Gothard and Doug Phillips are not the spokesmen for the homeschool movement.   They represent an ideology that has somehow, over the years, gotten much more attention than it ever should have received.

These men have told us how to dress, what to say, when to use birth control (or not) and how to school our children. I say it’s time we had a discussion about it. There’s an elephant in the homeschool movement.

Someone said I was making a “mockery” of a fellow Christian by posting a link to the scandal on my page. I disagree. No one is making a mockery of a fellow Christian. Pretending that it didn’t happen is not helping anyone. Is it painful and embarrassing? Yes. Where there’s sin, pain is sure to follow. My heart breaks for the families, especially the women who have been hurt by the patriocentric, hyper-legalistic, hard-core fundamentalist mentality that has erroneously come to represent the homeschool movement.

Am I sorry to have to say names? Yes. But I’m even more sorry this has been allowed to continue unchecked for so long. Enough is enough. The number of women I have spoken privately to over the years who have been deeply wounded by these teachings compels me to break my silence about the ugly side of a movement that I love. The trouble is not homeschooling. The trouble is false or extra-biblical teaching that has infiltrated large parts of the homeschool movement.

Having been directly impacted by this teaching myself, I hope that others may finally find some release from the legalistic, man-centered teaching that these men and others like them espouse. This latest scandal has proven once again that we MUST NOT, we cannot, put our faith in men.

However, we mustn’t “throw the baby out with the bath water.” There are many good teachers out there who are stewarding God’s gift to them wisely and with great humility. But even a good teacher’s message is not above scrutiny.  As individuals, we should hold all things up to the authority of Scripture. We must study the Bible for ourselves rather than relying solely on the words of others, even if they seem like good words.

There are many flawed teachings at ATI and Vision Forum. The worst of them have deeply hurt women and young Christian girls who were vulnerable and whose parents were desperately searching for a formula that would produce the desired result. After all, who doesn’t want that perfect family, that obedient child, that perfect marriage? Formulaic teaching produces one of two things: pride (if/when we get it “right”) or discouragement, disillusionment, and guilt when we don’t.

Once again, thousands of parents who were looking to men have been disillusioned and wounded. Once again, we are left to weep and wonder why it was allowed to get this out of control. We must speak out.

By not speaking out, we become guilty by association. For example, it pains me that the seven children God has blessed me and my husband with automatically associates us with the “quiverfull movement.” Frankly, I’m embarrassed to be associated with such a movement. I have finally decided to be brave and just say it: I don’t believe this movement is biblical.

Movements like this start with a true biblical premise, the fact that the Bible says children are a blessing. This is truth! This is the message we should be sharing!  However, “ministries” like the ones Gothard and Phillips started tread deeply into areas of personal conviction, in an attempt to make others feel responsible to believe what they believe, even to the point of teaching things the Bible does not clearly address as fact.

My husband and I believe that homeschooling is a wonderful option for families. In fact, I’d go so far as to say we believe it is the best option. We are grieved to see how it has been hijacked by ideologies and legalism, especially since homeschooling affords us and our children so much freedom to learn and grow together. Homeschooling allows committed parents to provide an excellent education for their children. Homeschooling is not the problem.

The bottom line? Unless we begin to study the Bible for ourselves rather than blindly following the teachings of charismatic personalities, we will continue to see these kinds of abuses happen. Until we say collectively that “enough is enough” and talk about what has happened, it will continue.

Don’t turn away. Like a virus, sin festers and grows when it is ignored. Where forgiveness is needed, I pray we will forgive. Where repentance is required, I pray there is repentance. I don’t want our children to think that their father or I rely on anything but God. We don’t have all the answers. There is no formula, only faith guided by God’s truth.

The moment we begin to trust that God really can finish the work in our children that He began through us will be the moment we will truly learn to trust God and stop leaning on formulas. If you ever listen to a teacher or minister who directs you beyond the grace and love of Jesus alone, run. Our hope is in Jesus. No where else.

I’m praying a little more urgently for leaders and pastors and mothers and fathers tonight.

God knows we need His healing touch.

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For more information about Jay and Heidi St. John’s ministry:

Heidi St John Guide to Romance

Heidi St John Guide to Daylight

What is the Goal of Education?

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Have you ever wondered why education is such a big deal? Today I’m going to take you to a small verse in Luke that has implications as to why and how we educate our children. Luke 6:40 says, “A student is not above his teacher, but everyone when he is fully trained will be like his teacher.” Wow, that’s powerful stuff.

Do you remember when you were in school? Most of us were not homeschooled ourselves.  We attended school away from home where we were discipled by (that’s right) our teacher. We don’t often think of education this way, but by the end of the day, education is all about discipleship.

Jay and I have been saying this for years as we’ve been speaking around the country.  We did not realize the depth in the spiritual battle in the field of education until we got involved in ministering to homeschooling families.  I believe it is because education is much more important than we often realize! We are talking about the hearts and minds of the next generation of children. The Bible says in Luke 6:40 that when a child is fully trained, he will be like his teacher.

Now, is this condemnation to those who’ve chosen not to homeschool? Absolutely not, but it is a reminder that it matters who teaches your children. You see, discipleship is the goal of education. Christian homeschooling should not only be about teaching the ABC’s. Yes, academics are an essential component in homeschooling, but the foundation and power of homeschooling is found in the quiet resolve of two parents who are committed to teach their children to be fully devoted, mature followers of Jesus Christ. That comes first.

Now, can you do that without homeschooling your kids? Yes, I believe you can and we’ve seen parents do it successfully. But, the neat thing my husband and I realized about homeschooling our children is that the amount of time it gives us to disciple our children is second to none. Homeschooling has given us time with them that would have otherwise been given to a teacher, or a school system.

Understanding this is a crucial component of success in homeschooling. It is the key that unlocks the door to longevity in home education. The truth is, the best schedule and most efficient run home won’t keep you from burning out if you don’t know why you’re doing what you’re doing.

So, let me just ask you, busy mom, why are you raising your children? What is your goal for raising children? Most moms I know wouldn’t take on homeschooling in a million years without a driven desire. So, what’s driving you?

The answer to this question is going to define the education journey of your family. If you choose to homeschool your children, keeping the heart of homeschooling alive with the desire to impart wisdom, not just knowledge, to your children will help keep you going on the days when you wonder what in the world you got yourself into.

Once you truly know what education is about and decide why you are doing what you’re doing, you can begin to make a plan that will help you make the most of the homeschooling years, one moment at a time.

Part of the reason why I have been talking about legalism for the last couple of days, it is to remind parents how important it is for us to love each other. We should love each other regardless of the education choices we make for our children.  I wonder, as we wrestle these issues, are we loving each other?

The Bible says they will know we are Christians by our love. I want to encourage you to remember that the goal of education is discipleship.   As we raise our kids, let’s remember that passage in Luke: “When your child is fully trained, he will be like his teacher.”

That’s something to consider as parents—our children will be a lot like us.

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Heidi St John Homeschooling Guide to Daylight

Heidi St John Firmly Planted Family Devotional For All Ages

For Such a Time as This

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Have you ever struggled with fear?

Esther enters the Bible and enters history during the reign of King Ahasuerus, when the Persian Empire was at its peak. Esther’s challenge was to serve God in challenging circumstances. Now, Esther – as well as all the other women who were being considered to be King’s wife – knew that Ahasuerus was a fearful man and he had a lot of power. Esther had a lot of reason to be full of fear!

But the Bible mentions two different types of fear: the first type is beneficial, and is to be encouraged, and that is the fear of God. The Bible says the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. The second type of fear is detrimental and it is the kind that we need to overcome: it is the fear of man. The first type of fear brings with it blessings and benefits, and is the beginning of wisdom and leads us to understanding.  

In Psalm 111:10 we read that wisdom and our faith in the Lord leads us to understanding. The Bible says in Proverbs that only fools despise wisdom and discipline. And the fear of the Lord leads to light, rest, peace, and contentment in Proverbs 19:23. Proverbs 14:27 says it is the fountain of life and it provides security and a place of safety for us. We can see how fearing God can be encouraged, but fearing man is not beneficial at all. This is the spirit of fear that is mentioned in 2 Timothy 1:7 where we read “For God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power and love and a sound mind.” A spirit of fearfulness and timidity does not come from God. If you’re wrestling with the fear of man today, ask the Lord to take it from you. And as we learn more about Esther this week, you will discover as you give your fears over to the Lord, He will replace those fears with faith.

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Heidi St John Firmly Planted Family Devotional For All Ages

For a Future Generation

morningDevotions

“Let this be written for a future generation,
that a people not yet created may praise the Lord”

Psalm 102:18

This morning as I put the fan in my window and heard the sound of the birds outside, (Well, I’ll be honest, I can smell bacon cooking too—because my wonderful mom-in-love is making breakfast—don’t hate.) I thought about how precious each new day is.

But lately, it seems like many things are not right.  Like up is down and wrong is, well, right. I’ve reached the point where I don’t like to turn on the evening news.  Wars. Unscrupulous politicians. Abortion.

This world can seem so dark, can’t it?

But here’s the thing: we have a chance to shine a light into it.  Not our own light, but the light of Jesus in us.

Not for ourselves, but for future generation.  A generation yet unborn.

Here’s how you shine the light:

TELL of His faithfulness.
WRITE the truth. In your journal. In your Bible. Write about the things you know are true.
GO into the world (or your neighborhood, or your co-op) and give a reason for the hope that lies within you.
BE courageous.

I don’t know about you, but I want to be part of the witness to the next generation.  To write of God’s faithfulness, and tell of His justice, mercy and love.  Tell of the hope and the truth that is only found in God’s Word.

…that a people, not yet created, may praise the Lord.

 

 

Socialization. Seriously?

But What About Socialization?

I took another question from a parent today who is afraid that home schooled children are not going to know how to get along in the “real world.”

I gotta say, I’m amazed that the “socialization” question ever comes up anymore when it comes to homeschooling. It’s curious to me that the tables are not turned the other way. I’m wondering why we’re not asking the schools to defend the “socialization” that’s happening on playgrounds, on school busses and in the hallways of our local schools.

That’s what we should be talking about.

Heidi St John Homeschooling Guide to Daylight