Will the Parents Who Have Never Lost Sight of Their Child Please Stand Up?

Will the parents who have never lost sight of their child please stand up?

In yet another example of our culture gone bezerk, over 236,000 people have signed a petition calling for “Justice for Harambe,” the gorilla that was shot and killed after a four-year old boy fell into his enclosure at the Cincinnati Zoo.  

Go home, “Change.org.” You’re drunk.

Can any mother reading this REALLY tell me she has never lost sight of her child? Even for moment?

As a mother of seven I can assure you, children can be with you one minute and vanish the next. I think I’m a pretty good mom. BUT. I have “lost” my kids in Legoland, Disneyland, WalMart, church and even in my own home. (This happened in 1998. Turned out the child was up on the roof with her two year old sister in tow.) I know. You’re mad. Don’t worry. Happily, I know where my kids are at the moment of this blog post. You might be surprised to learn that three of my children have survived to adulthood. So far, the therapy bills aren’t too bad. Time will tell.

My point? I don’t think I’m the only parent who has felt the heart-stopping, sheer terror that comes from losing track of a child. Be careful when you judge the mothering of this woman. This was an accident. A horrible accident but an accident nonetheless. The zoo did the right thing. What would we all be saying right now if they had hesitated and the child was killed? What would the headlines be then?

The loss of the gorilla’s life is tragic—but in this upside-down world, we seem to be placing a higher value on the life of an animal than we do on our own children. We want to judge the zoo and the mother for taking the life of the gorilla—nevermind that it was necessary to save the life of the child.

But we don’t care about the child, do we? Not really.

125,000 human beings are murdered EVERY DAY through abortion, with a negligible number of people speaking on their behalf, but a gorilla is killed to protect the life of a child, and 236,000 people rush to his defense. All I can do is sit here and shake my head.

21% of all US pregnancies end in abortion. One gorilla is killed to protect a child and we want to crucify the parents instead of being grateful that the boy is not dead or terribly injured.

Sad situation indeed, but I feel for the parents who are being judged so harshly. 

We’ve got a huuuuuge priority problem in this nation. It’s time we talked about THAT.

Heidi St John Homeschooling Guide to Daylight

This entry was posted in Current Events, MomStrong Parenting and tagged on by .

About Heidi St. John

Heidi has been married to her husband Jay since 1989. Together they have seven children and three grandchildren! The St. Johns homeschooled their kids all the way through high school. Heidi is the the author of seven books, host of the popular podcast "Off the Bench," and the founder of MomStrong International, an online community of women learning God's Word and how to apply it to every day life. She and her husband Jay are also the founders of Firmly Planted Family and the Firmly Planted Homeschool Resource Center, located in Vancouver, Washington.

113 thoughts on “Will the Parents Who Have Never Lost Sight of Their Child Please Stand Up?

      1. me

        Oh please, this has nothing to with abortion, how you connected the two is ridiculous. you are ridiculous!

        Reply
        1. Heidi St. John Post author

          I find it sad that rather than attack my position, you have attacked me personally. We are sinking to new lows in terms of valuing others, as is evidenced by the many rude and thoughtless remarks on this issue. I think my correlation to abortion is correct. Why is the same outrage not focused on the loss of innocent HUMAN life? It’s a good question and it’s worth answering.

          Reply
        2. Dara

          It’s a valid comparison. Nothing ridiculous about it, at all. It’s almost as though your comment is an effort to prove her point which was…we care more about one dead animal than thousands of dead human babies.

          Reply
    1. Diane

      I agree ,this woman seems to have to many Children than she can deal with ? Also she does not have the right to Judge others of painfull decisions they might have made .

      Reply
    2. Brandi

      You know, Jennifer, with just her three kids who have reached adulthood, by their 18th birthday they had each lived 6570 days. That is 19710 collective days they could have been lost. And that isn’t counting the other 4 kids. I think having only 5 instances of a lost child is a pretty damn good average. Careful you don’t fall off of that high horse of yours.

      Reply
    3. Merlina

      5 times is negligible number in a life of children getting lost especially if these children are very curious when you take them out. The most important thing is to train your kids what to do if they get lost starting at the age of 2. You must understand mothers or fathers or other adults are not always perfect in watching children so please don’t say it is not anything to be proud of….

      Reply
      1. Heidi St. John Post author

        I agree, Merlina! The arrogance of Jennifer’s position is sad. I have watched my kids for a total of 37,960 days (only taking my oldest up to the age of 21.) Of those 37,960 days, I’ve lost them five times… so I’m not thinking that’s such a bad average. All this “I’d NEVER do that” etc. etc. is sickening and arrogant. But by the grace of God you have not taken your eyes off your children for a moment. My goodness. Whatever happened to being honest about our mistakes instead of saying we’ve never made any?

        Reply
        1. Kaeli Burgess

          Exactly… my son is two. I was outside with him, playing and for a HALF OF A SECOND I turned my head to take the leaves and I looked up and he was gone. Thankfully I noticed quick enough to find him but had I not? There’s no way that Jennifer has not ever experienced one of those split second moments. My mom lost my brother at the beach because he was being potty trained and went to the bathroom by himself. They shut the wheel place done and found him and he says “I had to go potty”.. how scary is that? And she is the one amazing mother I will ALWAYS look up to.

          Reply
    4. Connie

      i had four children and though I consider myself a good mom I have to admit I lost one son twice. Once at home He crawled under the laundry I had taken out of the dryer and put on the bed until I got done with another chore. the other when we were at the flea market. Thank God he was not lost for long. Those people should be mad at the zoo for not having had a better barrier ( like Glass on the bottom half of the bars).

      Reply
    5. RBurns

      Jennifer: let me guess. You are a self-absorbed, delusional 20-something who’s never been married and has no children that thinks she knows everything about life simply because you exist, especially what it means to be a parent. If so, guess again. Either way, you are too clueless to even realize how clueless you are.

      Reply
    6. Kathy

      I guess you are the only one standing..or just blind to your own faults. There are no perfect parents and I find it hard to believe that there is one parent out there who has never lost sight of their child at one time or another. (This is only for parents who have children over a year old!!)

      Reply
    7. Geneva

      I will stand up. I have never lost sight of my own child or any child I was in charge of. I am OK with being called judgmental because I believe that it is a parents place to WATCH their children. I am sick of people getting idiot passes in this day and age. Back when we were kids parents did judge other parents and those ones who cared about what people thought made sure their kids behaved. My parents raised six kids. They never “lost” any of us. We had manners, went all over and were respectful of others and of rules and property. Those are traits society lacks these days. Maybe if more parents actually parented their kids we would not have situations like this. He was 3 he should have had his hand held or been in a stroller or leashed. And yes I said leashed! If you have too many kids that you cant hold their hands then put a backpack leash on them and hold it. The bottom line is you are the parent YOU are responsible.
      I’m not a perfect parent but I am a good parent and I know there are many good parents out there just like me who have never “lost” their kid or had their kid run wild. So call me names. call me judgmental. I do not care. But one thing you cannot call me is a bad parent.

      Reply
      1. Carebear

        Not everyone is perfect and losing your child could be in an aisle at the grocery store, walking up and down the aisles looking for them, me being my obnoxious self, yelling their name. I really hated reading your comment. You sound condescending and pompous. I have lost my three kids at least once. My ex husband watched my son walk out the door and didn’t even stop him. He was gone for three hours when I was at the grocery store and he walked uptown in our what was a little town at that point in time. Someone I had talked to once at the store brought him home when I spent that three hours driving around town, panicking. We lived in the mountains, bears a lot of wildlife I thought he was dead. I was livid and freaking out. But as to you NOT EVER losing track of your child I find it very hard to believe. Just my opinion. All of it is my opinion, but I am guaranteed I am not the only one that is thinking it, I was just able to say it.

        Reply
      2. Mel

        So sad. I grew up in a time when mom sent me and a younger brother and older sister outside I the summer
        We would walk all over the country roads, explore timber, etc. We were all under 12 years old. We grew up able to care for ourselves and be independent. Today, kids are coddled so much they need “safe places” from people exercising free speech that bothers them. Kids can not grow up to be adults if mom and dad have to hover over them every minute of their life.
        I agree that accidents happen and people have over reacted. Any child is more important than ANY animal.

        I also agree that the outrage for this animal should be directed at the callous destruction of unborn babies.

        Reply
    8. Troy

      Jennifer, as the father of a dead toddler who has heard many times that “the child wouldn’t have died under MY watchful eye,” I just have to say to those who are smug in their self-assurance that the fall is a hard one, and the lesson in compassion and proper decorum is not worth the cost. If at all possible, learn it at a discount.

      Reply
    9. katie

      Apparently there is no room for error when it comes to parenthood! I am sure you all are perfect people! I have never lost a child. My kids are 6, 5, and 3 years old! I don’t take them out much. ” I am sorry kids you have to share a world with unforgiving people, lets stay here and play at home today” I stand behind all mothers! This family has been social criticized! Isn’t that enough!!! Please society stop talking and started forgiving!

      Reply
    10. Audra

      a big difference here is that the child kept repeatedly saying he wanted to go in with them. If this was a child full of will (sounds like he was) the mother should have been EXTRA OBSERVANT of him. Also forgotten is the fact she was minding 4 other kids!!!

      Reply
  1. Katie

    shutup about abortion. Abortion and this situation are COMPLETELY different. I also read that the child was openly trying to breach the barricade and saying he wanted in the enclosure. And that alone should be enough to either remove your child or watch them closer. I don’t think the parents deserve death threats or anything but it does seem there was slight neglect when it came to watching the boy

    Reply
    1. Daisy Paige

      I was in complete agreement with this blog post until she went off on the abortion tangent. Say what??

      Reply
      1. Heidi St. John Post author

        The comparison is valid. We scream and yell about a gorilla but stay silent as our most vulnerable are torn limb from limb and taken from their mother’s womb. So sad. So heartbreaking. And yet… we want to send the parents of this 4 year old to jail. All I can do is shake my head.

        Reply
  2. Scott

    If you are in a potentially dangerous place or situation, you should have your full attention on your child, have your child’s hand, or have a leash on them. You talk about losing your 2 children only to fond them on a ROOF!?!? Can anyone say Human Services safety check? Iknow several couples that have never lost their children. If they are too small to understand the importance of staying with their parents, they should be attached somehow or at least holding hands and those that are old enough should know better but also need close attention paid in dangerous situations. Yes I have children and no I have never lost track of them.

    Reply
    1. Kathy

      I would assume that no one thought that this WAS a potentially dangerous situation and that this enclosure was something that was unbreachable, especially by a curious child. I am sure many parents will be hanging onto their children a little tighter because of this sad situation. I find it especially disturbing that people can’t find empathy or understanding but want to pat themselves on the back on what a good job they do as parents. Wow ..all I can say is its only by the grace of God that all has gone accordingly to this point in your life! There aren’t any perfect parents..just so you know.

      Reply
    2. Jen Hanson

      I have to speak up here about the 2 kids on the roof and your suggesting Human Services should have been called for a safety check. My Mom and Dad divorced when I was 3 and my Brother was 4. My Mom got a call at 3 a.m. from a neighbor telling her that she’d gotten up to go the bathroom and heard 2 little voices outside calling “Daddy? Daaaaddy? Come home!” When she looked outside she saw my brother and I sitting on the PEAK of the 2 story church with a flashlight. We had climbed the fire escape and then crawled up the slanted roof. Was my Mother to blame? NO! My brother was an extremely smart kid, even to the extent of reading minds. My Mother had double locks on all the doors and the windows were locked. My brother DISMANTLED the window in my room (4 years old remember…) and we climbed out. She couldn’t possibly stay awake 24/7 to watch him. I try not to judge others (that’s God’s job and I think he’s probably quite good at it!) and not assume the worst in people. Parenting is hard! Just another side…

      However, I do feel this parent should have been more in tune with what was going on with her son. The fact he kept saying he wanted to go in with the gorilla should have been enough for the parent to realize they needed to pick the child up, but preferably leave the area.

      Reply
    3. Marvelous Mom

      Gee, I wish I was as perfect as you people. If I had helicoptered my son, he might have grown up unable to stand on his own two feet and make his own decisions. He would still be living with me and expecting me to take care of him. At what stage to you let them off the leash? 4? 8? 16? At some point, no matter how well you watch and teach and tether, your kid will wander off and explore the world and –*gasp!*– make bad choices. And I don’t believe you have NEVER taken your eyes off your child. It’s physically impossible. Just because they didn’t wander off and get into trouble doesn’t make you a perfect parent. It makes you a LUCKY parent. Get over yourself.

      Reply
  3. Lacey

    I’m standing up, because I’ve never lost my child. Ever. Not at Disneyworld, Walmart, the beach, etc. I’m not better than anyone, but it’s a fact. He’s never been lost, because NO MATTER where I am HE is always first priority.My guard is always up when it comes to making sure he is safe. I’m not saying I’m a better parent than anyone else. I know things happen, but just because things happen doesn’t make them ok. I don’t think the gorilla’s life is more valuable than the life of the 4 year old. I just think the entire situation could have been avoided in the first place. If this child had been “forgotten” by accident in a hot car to die would that be ok, because sometimes life is crazy and us mom’s need grace? So why are we defending the parents in this situation? He fell into an enclosure, because “things happen”, so it’s different? It’s negligence on the parents fault either way. It’s sad, I hate that it happened, but there is no excuse.

    Reply
    1. Heidi St. John Post author

      Most tragedies can be avoided, can they not? What about the mom who’s son darts out in front of a car? What about the children who drown? We could do each other a whole lot of good by identifying where we can relate and encouraging each other to do better, not condemning a mother who is already full of regret and embarrassment. I’m sad at the lack of empathy coming from another mom. Very sad.

      Reply
      1. Jess

        Couldn’t have said it better myself! If this woman needs to be charged with neglect, then why isn’t these parents also being charged with neglect that has lost sight of their child for a moment that resulted in their child’s death? Drowning, being hit by a car, falling from a balcony, the list goes on. None of these things happened because of bad intentions on the parents part, tragedies happen on a daily basis. As a parent myself of 2 kids, I can admit that I lost sight if my oldest 1 time! I am a great mother and if anyone knew what I went through to have kids, they would know what a blessing my kids are! I was always prepared, took extra precautions when we were at a place that would be crowded, but it still happened!Am I a negligent parent? No!! Did I feel a tremendous amount of guilt? Absolutely! People are pissed at this mother simply because it resulted in the death of a gorilla! When did a child’s life become so valueless? I hope these people never have to experience such a tragedy, because I hope they realize this is how the world will react! No mercy, no empathy, filled with hate and judgements! People suck!

        Reply
  4. Erica

    Standing up right now. No, I have not lost my child, especially in a theme park or zoo. We have always had rules established for our outings because my children’s lives do matter.
    The safety of these animals does matter too. They are also our responsibility.
    We need to take time to acknowledge the truths in this situation and repair the errors.
    #1 Obviously, there are some safety issues for the animals at the zoos and the people, if the public can get to them.
    #2 Personal responsibility of every person for their safety and the safety of their family.

    We do not get to say that being a mom is hard so it’s okay to lose your child. No, it is not okay to lose your child especially a four year old at a zoo.

    Using examples of ignorance will not bring a neglected child’s life back, will it? Nope, never.

    Being responsible for your children, keeping them safe, always watching them especially in public places, that keeps the child safe.

    Having a blog does not make you the parental advice navigation unit.

    My advice from this tragic event, WATCH YOUR KIDS. There are far worse than gorillas in this society and there are no gates, walls, or motes to protect you from the human element.

    Reply
    1. Heidi St. John Post author

      What? Having a blog does not make me a parental advice navigation unit? Rats. Here I thought the blog did that.
      …and in other news, I notice you are giving quite a bit of advice…

      Reply
    2. sharon

      I’m standing up too, I have never lost a child. I have 2 sons one is now 20 and working in a school and the other has special needs and is 10. I would never leave a small child without them either being in a pram or on reins when we were in a bust environment like a zoo, theme park shopping mall etc, there’s plenty of places my kids got hands free freedom, but busy big places aren’t the appropriate places to leave it to chance. I give this mother my full sympathy but I don’t buy ito every mother that says she keeps a more watchful eye and so hasn’t lost a child is called a liar repsect goes both ways here

      Reply
      1. Heidi St. John Post author

        So you NEVER, EVER, took your eyes off your child. Not to take a shower, not to move the laundry from one machine to the other. You never were distracted by the crying of another child. You never took your eyes off them while you were sleeping. You’re the first one I’ve ever met. I guess I just don’t buy it.

        Reply
        1. sharon

          Having the children in your house while you do chores isn’t loosing them, and they won’t fall into a gorilla enclosure, I did say there’s places to be more relaxed where these dangers aren’t an issue busy zoo’s festivals theme parks etc etc etc are places to be extra vigilant not less so.I also said the mum here has my sympathy. Try not to judge extra vigilant parents by assuming they’re lying,we’re all parents doing our best, my best might be too strict for you, your best might be too relaxed for me, and that’s fine not buying peoples truth that they haven’t lost their kids comes across as a little arrogant and also a little like spitting at anything that goes against what you think is real based only on your own experiences. I thank God this child was ok, his mum was lucky this time, hopefully there won’t be a next time

          Reply
          1. Heidi St. John Post author

            I guess, Sharon, that my point is simply this: it can happen in an instant. People are rushing to judgment when the truth is it could happen to any of us at any time. It really can.

    1. Cathy

      And are you and all the other “pro lifers” willing to raise the 20% of children of women who agonized over a decision and knew they weren’t in a position to raise a child??? Do you know how many children are in foster care and NEVER get a permanent family? And were you around before abortion was legal and desperate women went to “back alley” unsafe “doctors” who provided abortions. Well I was and it was a tough fight to legalize that RIGHT TO MAKE A DECISION ABOUT YOUR OWN BODY.

      Reply
      1. Heidi St. John Post author

        Yes. There are many, many parents willing to adopt. The process should be made easier for good parents to take these precious kids. This whole idea that those who support life will not take care of it is unfounded and a straw man argument. Watch an abortion. Let me know how that sits with you. Abortion is not just one body. Not just one life. It’s two.

        Reply
      2. JSells

        Yeah because most abortions are agonizing….I know at least 10 women who use abortion as birth control and I’m sure there are PLENTY more!!!

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      3. SHANNON

        As an adoptive mom, YES! I have 3 children, one by my womb, one by my husband’s first marriage, and one through adoption. Children are the FUTURE. We must protect them! Your body does not include a separate human body. Keep your knees together if you aren’t ready to parent. And, don’t play the rape card, which accounts for a very small minority of abortions, of which adoptive parents are more than willing to raise the child, no matter the method of conception! Heidi was simply using abortion as a way of pointing out how backward our thinking has become. How about we stand up and demand the release of all animals from zoos? No matter if the wild would be unsafe for them, or we’d lose the ability to learn from them? I feel horrible for the gorilla, and feel that sedation would have certainly been a better option, but the fact is that a child’s life trumps that of an animal. Period.

        Reply
  5. steve

    First-hand account copied from another article:

    My family and I decided to go to the zoo yesterday after visiting my neice at Cincinnati Childrens hospital. For those of you that have already heard, there was a terrible accident there yesterday. And since every news media has covered this story, I don’t feel bad telling our side. This was an accident! ! A terrible accident, but just that! My husband’s voice is the voice talking to the child in one of the videos. I was taking a pic of the female gorilla, when my eldest son yells, “what is he doing? ” I looked down, and to my surprise, there was a small child that had apparently, literally “flopped” over the railing, where there was then about 3 feet of ground that the child quickly crawled through! ! I assumed the woman next to me was the mother, getting ready to grab him until she says, “Whose kid is this? ” None of us actually thought he’d go over the nearly 15 foot drop, but he was crawling so fast through the bushes before myself or husband could grab him, he went over! The crowed got a little frantic and the mother was calling for her son. Actually, just prior to him going over, but she couldn’t see him crawling through the bushes! She said “He was right here! I took a pic and his hand was in my back pocket and then gone!” As she could find him nowhere, she lookes to my husband (already over the railing talking to the child) and asks, “Sir, is he wearing green shorts? ” My husband reluctantly had to tell her yes, when she then nearly had a break down! They are both wanting to go over into the 15 foot drop, when I forbade my husband to do so, and attempted to calm the mother by calling 911 and assure her help was on the way. Neither my husband or the mother would have made that jump without breaking something! I wasn’t leaving with my boys, because I didn’t trust my husband not to jump in and the gorilla did just seem to be protective of the child. It wasn’t until the gorilla became agitated because of the nosey, dramatic, helpless crowd; that the gorilla violently ran with the child! And it was very violent; although I think the gorilla was still trying to protect, we’re taking a 400 lb gorilla throwing a 40 lb toddler around! It was horrific! The zoo responded very quickly, clearing the area and attempting to save both the child and the gorilla! The right choice was made. Thank God the child survived with non-life threatening, but serious injuries! This was an open exhibit! Which means the only thing separating you from the gorillas, is a 15 ish foot drop and a moat and some bushes! ! This mother was not negligent and the zoo did an awesome job handling the situation! Especially since that had never happened before! ! Thankful for the zoo and their attempts and my thoughts and prayers goes out to this boy, his mother and his family.

    This was copied and pasted from another article where the actual person beside the woman posted. Don’t believe the media. Their job is to feed you half truths and get the public stirred into a hate frenzy.

    Reply
  6. Michele

    The boy is safe. The gorilla is dead. Let’s move on and learn from this. Fix the problem by putting up better barriers.

    Reply
  7. Sandra Norvell

    First of all, yes, the zoo had no other choice at that point but to kill the gorilla. I’ve seen all the footage, not just what was initially released to the public and you had a 400 lb. gorilla tossing a 4 year old around. The only thing I find fault with the zoo is that the barriers weren’t obviously people proofed. Could the zoo have foreseen something like this happening? Yes, this has happened many times all over the world.
    Now as far as the mother? Yes, she should have watched her child better and she should have taught him that when she told him he couldn’t go see the gorillas, she meant it. I have taught school for 32 years. Each year I take 20 to 22 6 to 7 year old students on a field trip, many times to the zoo. I have never lost a child. I have never had a child begin to wander from my group that I didn’t see it within seconds and called him back. My eyes are everywhere, every second. I constantly count heads. I don’t talk on the phone. I don’t even look at the animals for myself. Why? Because the zoo trip is for the children to enjoy and it is my one job to keep them safe. I have children with all kinds of issues, ranging from ADHD to autism. Occasionally, I have a parent of two to go with me. Their job is to look after their own child, I look after the other 16 or 17 myself. So I understand what it is like to have charge of a large group of challenging children in an unrestricted place like the zoo. I’m not alone, thousands of teachers do it every day.
    So yes, the child’s life was more important. My protest is that it could have been prevented if the humans had done what they were supposed to beforehand.

    Reply
    1. Sandy

      It simply should not have happpened ….as a parent and grandparent, it is our RESPONSIBILITY to keep our children safe …. all it takes is a “blink of an eye” for somebody to abduct your child, have your child get hit by a car, fall into a pool, etc. These parents should be held accountable as well as the zoo for not providing a safer enclosure … and if there were so many onlookers that the mom couldn’t get the stroller through, how did not one of them see the child in time to stop it???
      Absolute neglect!

      Reply
  8. Sue

    I have just read these comments. I never in my life time heard so much anger and bitterness between people. The post was great someone’s view. The nastinesstowards each other and that mom;no need. Realky it doesn’t matter how the child got in,scary. As what happened next people made a discission to save a child’s life. Sadly there was a death of a beautiful life, but a life was saved as well.that poor animal should never have been there to begin with humans are to plan all the way not the mom or the zoo workers just keep going back. Humans are to blame, selfish humans. Stop being so nasty and mean to each other.we are the only ones to stop hate and pain.

    Reply
  9. Sandra Creamer

    It’s sad that any kind of animal must be shot and killed in captivity, but its also sad that everyone wants to blame the parents for neglecting the child. When you take your child to the zoo, you expect the exhibits to be safe and that there is no possible way that a child can crawl into an exhibit. And no one expected that a child would ever want to do something like that. So no the parents should not be blamed, nor should the zoo officials. What should be focused on is improving all exhibits of all zoos so that incidents like this can not happen.

    Reply
      1. Rachel

        A man recently told me that we judge ourselves by our intentions and judge others by their actions. The more I read about this, the more heartbreaking it is. When the family decided to go to the zoo that day, they had no idea of the tragedy that would ensue. Thank the Lord that the little boy is alive and I hope that he completely recovers. Thank you for your post. I wish that I hadn’t read the comments though because it made me sad to hear how mean and horrible people can be about big families, parents and pro-life opinions. That’s enough social media for me for one day. I’m going to go read my little ones a book in the fort that they have been playing in while I read this blog. 🙂 Thank you for speaking out about God’s Word, Jesus and His love. I love reading your posts.

        Reply
        1. Jane

          Heidi – it is a good post – and I agree with Rachel – so sad to hear such hate-filled opinions. It seems like people missed the point – the child’s life is more important than the animals. Period. Don’t judge this mother – she has enough heartache and self-recriminations. Be a little kinder.

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      2. Sandy Rempher Solberg

        It simply should not have happpened ….as a parent and grandparent, it is our RESPONSIBILITY to keep our children safe …. all it takes is a “blink of an eye” for somebody to abduct your child, have your child get hit by a car, fall into a pool, etc. These parents should be held accountable as well as the zoo for not providing a safer enclosure … and if there were so many onlookers that the mom couldn’t get the stroller through, how did not one of them see the child in time to stop it???
        Absolute neglect!

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      3. Judy Hill

        Exactly….for the mom who’s never ‘lost’ a child….good for you….but sometimes, unless you have a kid tethered to you 24/7/365, bad things can happen, even to those parents who are incredibly responsible…Remember Elizabeth Smart? She was in the safety of her home with her parents feet away and yet she fell in harm’s way…

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  10. Cathy

    How sad the humans feel that they are superior beings over all other living beings on this planet. We were all created to live on earth and how is it that humans are more valuble for some reasons. Humans treat one another far worse than any other species on earth.

    Reply
    1. Barb

      While I agree humans can treat others the worst of all, God gave humans dominion over the earth and the creatures He created. Only humans were created in God’s image, animals were not.

      Reply
  11. Deborah S

    I had three children under the age of 5. [They are each adult now]. One with autism, one with Asperger’s Syndrome. I had a difficult time managing all three just shopping at Walmart. I knew that I had a challenge keeping them all safe as we walked across parking lots, crossed streets, participated in activities and events, went to a pool, jumped on a trampoline, etc. There were risks and dangers every where which were increased due to my children’s special needs, comprehensive and cognitive deficiencies. I took them many places. I never lost a child in a public place because I realized what the outcome of that could and most likely would be. If you wish to take pictures, want to shop, have a number of small children should you not take into consideration that you may require some assistance with keeping them safe and with being aware of their location while you’re visiting a public place that has numerous risks and dangers?
    Seriously, wild animals…why would you allow your child to roam unattended in areas that house wild animals, especially after he’s stated he’s going to do something risky, dangerous, and life threatening? I am not judging the mom, the bystanders, the zoo, or anyone. I sincerely feel it’s time to take account of our parenting skills and our priorities when something like this happens. An endangered animal is dead because? The mother didn’t keep close watch on her children? She didn’t take into consideration that she might require help to maintain her children’s safety? Yes, accidents happen but they can also be avoided and/or limited when the proper precautionary measures are taken.
    And…why must we mix issues? Why bring abortion into this conversation or discussion? How is that helpful?
    This situation is sad on multiple levels.

    Reply
  12. AJ Johnson

    I think any good parent knows that different locations and situations require different levels of awareness. Lose sight of your child in Target for 2 minutes and chances are you’re just going to have a brief scare. Lose sight of your child for 30 seconds while waiting for the bus on the side of a busy Highway and chances are much better that your lapse of attention will result in tragedy! Turn around for a moment at the park and you might miss your kid falling out of the swing. Turn around at the pool or beach and you might miss your child drowning!
    This isn’t your run of the mill “Where’s Timmy? Oh, there he is!” type of situation. This is “Where’s Timmy? OH MY! HE’S GOING TO BE MAULED BY A WILD ANIMAL!” dangerous, life and death scenario! It’s seriousness is magnified by the fact that zoo keepers felt that the only safe thing to do is fire a bullet in the general direction of a child, to kill an animal that might seriously injure or kill the child!
    It’s tragic that an animal that was doing nothing wrong was killed because of a stupid parent and a curious child, but even if the incident had ended with the gorilla being tranqualized and the child rescued without harm, I’d still say that the parent needs to be charged.
    If you don’t think that the mother was negligent and endangered her child, and that this is no worse than the numerous times you say you lost track of your own children, then you aren’t a good parent who lost sight of their kids like every other parent, you’re just an extremely lucky person who probably shouldn’t have any more kids!

    Reply
    1. Barb

      Really? Because child predators are everywhere. Lose your child in a store, and bad things can and do happen. One tragedy isn’t better than the other.

      Reply
  13. Laura Groseth

    No, I never once lost either of my boys….ever. We went on tons of vacations & day trips and this never happened. I was a single mom too without the benefit of a spouse to help watch. This doesn’t make me a perfect mom however, I was just vigilant. First hand witnesses said this mother was taking photos – even after the boy declared several times that he wanted to go in the enclosure. She didn’t even know he had gone in until he was in the water. That’s not just an accident, it happened because she wasn’t paying attention. When she gave her public statement, she showed no remorse for the animal. She said “accidents happen”. I think that’s what has everyone so up in arms. It was so avoidable.

    Reply
  14. Sonya

    “One gorilla is killed to protect a child and we want to crucify the parents instead of being grateful that the boy is not dead or terribly injured”

    No, ppl are made because the parents didn’t have enough commonsense not to put their child in a situation where an animal had to be killed! Ppl are mad that these ignorant parents have yet to express remorse or regret for what their actions (or lack of) caused.

    Instead, they act like it was the zoo’s fault.

    Reply
  15. Brad

    I guess we first have to determine the value of the boy’s life versus the gorilla’s.

    If we’re strictly dealing in species rarity, it’s no contest. We’ve got about 100,000 Western Lowland Gorillas left. We’ve got about 7 Billion humans. If rarity is the metric, then each gorilla is worth about 70,000 little boys.

    Maybe you’d rather consider global impact as the metric for value. One could always argue that maybe this little boy will grow up to be President, and certainly no gorilla can top that. But if we’re being honest here and using historical trends, this is an African American from a non-affluent family with a father who has a substantial criminal record. The sad reality is that he’s likely to follow close behind his parents, as most children raised in those circumstances do. Meanwhile, Harambe had already served as a source of study, a source of education, a source of inspiration, and a source of entertainment for thousands upon thousands of people.

    It’s only if we presume that every human life is more sacred than all other life that we can honestly value this boy’s life above Harambe’s. And perhaps that’s the right thing to do. But, for some reason, using “because he’s human” as the rationale seems pretty short-sighted, and those of you who might argue that point may in fact be hypocritical when asked how you feel about the death penalty.

    Reply
  16. JSells

    I can honestly say I’ve never lost my child!!! My sis took her to the bathroom once at Walmart without telling me…but that’s as close to losing her I ever got!! She was told as soon as she didn’t want to sit in the carriage anymore that she HAD to stay next to the cart and ask permission if she wanted to walk away from it!!!

    Here is what gets me about this woman in particular…her son said he wanted to go in the water (more than once) RED FLAG!!! I can’t imagine ignoring my 4 yr old child long enough after that for said child to crawl under a fence, through thick bush and over the wall…haven’t heard ANY witness say she was even frantically looking for him before they saw him in the moat! She was too busy with “several” other children!!

    I know I’ll get crap because I only have one and blah blah blah but that’s because I know how NOT to get pregnant and pop out kids I didn’t plan and can’t take care of!!!

    Reply
  17. Jeanene Hunter

    In my humble opinion, it seems that there must be circumstances when an able bodied parent simply cannot lose sight of their child. This might have been one of them. I am wondering if the mother would have responded “accidents happen” if the outcome for her child had been different. With this in mind, I am not a part of the “Justice for Harambe” group.

    Reply
  18. Annie Venable

    Thank you for saying what I’ve been thinking ever since this incident hit the news. There is no parent anywhere who has never lost sight of a child for a minute. It is frightening but it happens. Contrary to what is being batted around by hateful people in the blogosphere, it doesn’t mean the parent is lazy, irresponsible, stupid, a terrible person, or has too many kids. What it DOES mean is that parents are HUMAN and no human is perfect. Years ago my husband and I were working in our fenced in back yard and our three preschoolers were playing within sight. I heard tires squeal and was seized with panic as I realized my toddler was missing. It turned out the gate had been left open. She’d wandered into the street and literally been snatched out of the path of an oncoming car by a neighbor. That was 16 years ago and I was a stay at home mom whose whole world revolved around my kids. I watched them ALL the time (except evidently that second). Was I negligent? YES, in that moment, I was. Does that make me a terrible, unfit parent? Judging by my loving, kind, teenage honors students I think we’re doing alright. Parenting is a journey. One moment (good or bad) does NOT permanently define someone as a success or failure. I for one am about ready to proclaim judgement on a woman I don’t know whose kid was missing for less than a minute at the zoo…I’m just thankful that the child was alright.

    Reply
  19. Rob

    This animal called the gorilla was taken from his home and locked up by other animals called human beings. This gorilla was taken away from his own life, his home and his happiness. A human being fell into this cage that these human beings built to lock up this gorilla animal for no other reason than to look at him for their own enjoyment, so the human beings shot and killed the gorilla to protect the animal human being that fell into this cage that they built to wrongly lock up this gorilla. When you look at the picture it is clear that human beings are the worst animals that don’t deserve the gift of life. Whomever on here says that the gorillas life is not as important as any other, why don’t you go into the jungle and face the gorillas face to face and tell them that.. You will be the one that is taken from your own home and locked up in a cage in your next life and looked at just for enjoyment. Never took my kids to a zoo and never will. The animals that built these places should be the ones locked up..

    Reply
  20. missyinda

    well there are only 786 of these gorillas left, but there are over 7 billion people. Im not saying the life of the gorilla was more important than the child’s however both lives were important. If your in a public place and your kids are little, they make kid leashes for a reason so you can keep them safe and out of harms way

    Reply
    1. H.A.

      Yeah, and when people see a kid on a leash, the parents of that kid get judged pretty harshly too. Can’t win as a parent, no matter what you do.

      Reply
  21. Monica

    I was at a museum the other day and was fairly disgusted at the number of parents who let their kids run wild. Running through the public space, getting in the way of other visitors, running their hands all over exhibit cabinets. There seems to be very little respect and certainly little training by the parents.

    Also was surprised by the number of people with large families. In an overpopulated world which is destroying our biodiversity, I find it completely irresponsible to have more than two children. Then I come across this blog with someone who has seven. So, if you’re wondering why people are upset about the killing of this rare gorilla, a lot of the anger is coming from the fact that Homo sapiens is killing off everything. Should be pretty simple to comprehend.

    The view that Man is the Most Important is so offensive and ego-driven, I can’t even comprehend it. Gorillas, among many other mammals, are sentient, smart creatures. I don’t know why Man believes he has the right to take the lives of these innocent creatures. They ask so little of us, and what do we do? We take their living space, we burn them alive (orangutans), we boil them and eat them (Yulan Dog Festival), we massacre mother and unborn baby for their tusks (rhino), we kill them because we believe their body parts give men enhanced sexual powers (tigers) … the list is endless.

    Perhaps more people should consider the importance of ending out-of-control breeding and start working to take care of the natural world.

    To the blog writer: why don’t you sit down sometime and do the math. Calculate if each of your seven kids has seven kids, and each of them had seven. Just figure that out for five generations, and see the number.

    Man’s inability to control his numbers and protect all the other life that has put on this Earth is, I think, an abomination to God. Put that in your peace pipe and smoke it, all you fundamentalist thinkers with your holier-than-thou speech, who always bring out the abortion card anytime there’s a senseless killing of a rare animal like this. Last year, it was Cecil, and the anti-abortion folks worked that one hard. Lame.

    Reply
    1. Heidi St. John Post author

      Monica. Your arrogance is so offensive (regarding large families, judging other parents with no knowledge of whether or not they actually WERE watching their kids in said museum, overpopulation… ) that I almost did not approve your comment for public viewing. I could write an entire book on what you said, but worst part is your belief that animals and people are the same. Wow. Just wow. Yes, we should protect creation, but people and animals are not the same thing. You’re still taking about Cecil… while ISIS is burning people alive in cages and beheading people in the streets. Where is your outrage over that? Where is your outrage over HUMAN babies being torn limb-from-limb from their mother’s womb?

      My point was that we have a priority problem as a culture. The priority should be our children. I grieve at the loss of the gorilla’s life—but the child was in danger and that was the priority.

      Reply
  22. Amber

    As a mother this article saddens me, no I have never “lost” a child. It’s crazy to try and make light of a situation like that. Currently the mother of a very rambunctious 4 year old boy who never stops this only reminds me he needs constant supervision. He also knows animals can be dangerous. That is another thing, why was that boy not taught hey… It’s against the law to enter an animal exibit. As for the blame yes it should be in fact on the mother who was busy on her CELLPHONE instead of watching her child.

    Reply
  23. David McAllan

    Congratulations on your blog post Heidi. It’s great to hear some common sense. I will just say as a Grandfather who lost his granddaughter in a road accident 2 yrs ago that such things as accidents happen when you least expect it. Some of these people who wrote their post know nothing of the proverb: “Pride comes before a fall”. That accident was a matter of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. The lead car stopped for a pie while the huge oversized machine continued down the rural road. He came to a bend which had a narrow bridge and although the vehicle in which my granddaughter was traveling locked up the brakes, it was too late and the machine went over the car flattening it. A combination of occurrences that all came together this one time to cause a tragedy. I agree that parents need to be diligent and I also think that many parents are irresponsible with their supervision of their children. However, just because some have not “lost” their children, doesn’t mean they will never lose them – no one but God is omnipotent. It is clearly an overestimation to consider oneself infallible. Perhaps it was not their motive to suggest that, but that is clearly what they are saying!

    Reply
  24. Tammy

    I love the truth in your blog. I am trying to think if I ever lost my child and I cannot honestly remember. However, there are variances for losing one’s child. There could be second’s, minute’s or moment’s. I have lost my child while playing “Hide & Seek”. My kids did forget to check in when they arrived at friends home’s or skating rink’s (as they started driving), so I guess I lost them. Their car’s and cell phone’s where ‘low-jacked’, let’s face it, the world is not like it once was. I say that to say this, my children are soon to be 20 and 26, but when we first moved to the Carolina’s in 2000, I walked into my kitchen and there was a little boy, about 4, in my refrigerator looking for a juice box and string cheese. I had a rather quiet giggle and very politely said “Hello, can I help you? Which house do you belong too?” Not for a moment was I mad, upset or panicky. This was the type of neighborhood we moved into. All of the neighborhood kids were outside in the cul-de-sac playing. All of the parents had juice boxes and snacks for the kids, my door was open. No one thought twice about it. Does this mean the other parent “lost her child?” I don’t think so. We lived in a place and time where kids could play together outside in a cul-de-sac and parents were a plenty to watch them and keep them hydrated and make sure know one had a boo boo.
    And if you read the report from the Zoo, they stated that there are places parents should hold on their children’s hands. Place’s like the Mall, shopping center’s, parking lot’s, however, they (The Zoo) feel like the Zoo should be a Safe Place for Children.
    It is tragic, the loss of any life….ANY LIFE. I am glad the child is doing well, I mourn for Herambe and the choice the Zoo made, however, the Zoo made tho only choice it could. Now I hope that in our ‘Sue Happy Culture’, that these parent’s do not chose to sue.

    Reply
  25. Shannon T

    While I emphatically agree that putting a gorilla down to protect a child is the right thing to do, I don’t care for the rush to defend this mom any more than I do the ones who attempt to vilify her.
    The MORE IMPORTANT issue to me is that parents should, in general, be more cognizant of the fact that a zoo is inherently more dangerous a place than Walmart or a walk in the park. I wish these types of incidents would result in an educational 2 min video playing on a loop at zoo entrances…
    I don’t use a leash harness on my kids on a daily basis, but I sure do at the zoo. Different places, different risks, call for differing preparedness.

    Reply
  26. mitzi

    this whole situation sheds so much light upon just how ignorant and self centered human beings are. Let’s first address the fact that Zoos are merely glorified animal prisons that humans attend so they can look at wild animals who are being held captive and not allowed to live as intended. So when a human child (who’s life will always, always, always be more valuable than any animal) falls into a wild gorilla containment area we’re all shocked and appalled that they animal had to be destroyed to save the child. Gimme a break, this is a preveted first world problem and I’ll be gald when we stop dwelling on it.

    Reply
  27. Kara

    Unfortunately this was not Walmart. I am a parent of 5.Yes I have lost my kids in a store.. If during the time they were lost. They broke something in said store. I would have paid for it.. He told her he was going to do it. He said Mom I am going to go in there with those gorillas. Do you need hit in the head to not see the signs? She was off taking pictures. No one is saying that this was not an accident.. I personally am saying there needs to accountability for this. Accident or not.. Bad parent or not.. Does not counteract the fact that this “accident” is going to cost the zoo thousands and thousands of dollars that they do not have to spare. This was not someones dog next door. This was an endangered species. So a moment of not paying attention has devastating effects in this situation. This entire country needs to start being held accountable for their actions spoiled rotten Americans are always let go with a slap of the hand.. ACCOUNTABILITY is all everyone wants.

    Reply
  28. Stacey

    I’m standing up because I have never lost my children or sight of my children and I don’t plan on it. With the world we live into today, you can’t just let your kids roam free.

    Reply
  29. viron boggs

    I have to say that the zoo done the right thing. had i been there I would have done the same thing. that gorilla would have killed the child eventually. no way is the gorilla’s life worth the life of a child. I want to congradulate the zoo on a job well done. the people of this country need to get their priorities strait, anyone who thinks different must not have children or just have no compassion for human lives.

    Reply
  30. Scott

    Zoo’s are an inherently dangerous place, they are after all filled with wild animals. I absolutely believe that the mother should be ridiculed for her neglect of allowing her child to make it all the way into the enclosure of a very dangerous animal. I perhaps understand losing track of your child at home or the grocery store, but at a place like that, there is no excuse. Also the excuse that some people keep using for her having more then one kid to keep track of, is completely null. If you are not able to handle the number of kids that you choose to have, then you certainly should not be taking them to a place like a zoo. Better yet don’t contribute to the overpopulation of this planet and have an appropriate amount of children.

    “in this upside-down world, we seem to be placing a higher value on the life of an animal than we do on our own children.” In this instance yes, I am putting the value of the life of the gorilla over that of a human. That animal was an endangered species, he never ever should have been in the position to be shot. Extinction rates are 100 times greater since human colonization. The human race is literally acting like a parasite on this planet. Maybe you don’t understand the implications of animals going extinct like this, but you won’t have to worry about issues like abortion when this planet is a baron waste land, unable to support life. I end with a beautiful quote from Captain Paul Watson, “If we’re gonna survive on this planet, we have to respect the rights of all those species to survive cause we need them more than they need us.” This is why I put the life of that gorilla over the life a human.

    Reply
    1. H.A.

      Scott, if it ever comes down to you or an animal, what do you think the choice should be? Just curious. You are one of the human parasites on this planet too. Remember that.

      Reply
  31. Teresa

    Without getting into the whole debate about who was at fault, Harambe was a magnificent animal. That being said, I refuse to criticize the parents because 1. I wasn’t there. 2. I am the mother of a child who sneaked out of the house and got stung by wasps, sneaked out of the house and ran away from home, drank STP Gas Treatment, escaped his crib in the middle of the night….climbed the kitchen cabinets…turned on the garbage disposal and started feeding it Oreos, sneaked out of the house and into a neighbor’s yard where he climbed a very tall tree and promptly fell out of said tree managing to rip the back of his right leg wide open on a branch, and last but not least, helped his sister eat a bottle of Flinstones vitamins behind the couch. This all happened before he was 5. I watched him. I had safeguards, but this was my kid who is now an electrician and a tower climber for an international company. Some kids are just wired for adventure. Try as I might, I could not save him from himself then or now. I’m surprised he’s still alive, but I wouldn’t want him to give up his quest for experiencing the unknown. That is precisely what got him where he is now.

    Reply
  32. W.

    So I’ve been thinking about this toddler/gorilla issue and something occurred to me… What about these parents? Worst parents EVER! I mean, lose your pre-teen for 3 days?! Why didn’t the authorities get involved? Talk about negligence.

    41 Every year Jesus’ parents went to Jerusalem for the Festival of the Passover. 42 When he was twelve years old, they went up to the festival, according to the custom. 43 After the festival was over, while his parents were returning home, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem, but they were unaware of it. 44 Thinking he was in their company, they traveled on for a day. Then they began looking for him among their relatives and friends. 45 When they did not find him, they went back to Jerusalem to look for him. 46 After three days they found him in the temple courts, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. 47 Everyone who heard him was amazed at his understanding and his answers. 48 When his parents saw him, they were astonished. His mother said to him, “Son, why have you treated us like this? Your father and I have been anxiously searching for you.”

    49 “Why were you searching for me?” he asked. “Didn’t you know I had to be in my Father’s house?”[a] 50 But they did not understand what he was saying to them.

    51 Then he went down to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them. But his mother treasured all these things in her heart. 52 And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man.

    Reply
  33. Lisa

    Heidi,
    After reading about 50 of the responses I just had to stop! All these “perfect” parents are killing me! Almost every parent I know has had accidents happen, my gosh, to raise children without accidents, what are you God! You all ought to get off your high horse! I’ve lost my kids, all 5 of them at some point in their life, oh no! Call CPS! The truth is I’m a darn good mom but it’s called life! You people are seriously crazy. Amen Heidi, for all you do for common sense! And God bless you for being a wonderful mama of 7!

    Reply
  34. Kacie

    As a mother of 3 young children, I completely understand and can relate to the craziness of everyday life, let alone going to a public place and trying to keep an eye on all 3 of my children. With that being said, I can honestly say I have NEVER lost one of my children. I’m not saying I’m a perfect parent, nor do I strive for perfection. I’ve had my fair share of parenting mishaps. Parenting does not come with a manual but it is our job as a parent to protect our children from any unnecessary harm.
    The issue at hand is your lack of compassion for the animal species “just an animal” and is what I find disturbing.
    Your comparison of this situation to abortion is completely irrivalat and absurd to the situation at hand. I personally don’t believe or condone abortion, but I do respect the choice and decision of other human beings. I am more than happy this child is safe and no harm done but that doesn’t mean there should not be justice for that innocent gorilla. just because a person has compassion for an animal does not mean they have any less compassion for a human life.
    The fact is, this child fell into a gorillas habitat because of lack of adequate supervision. Whether it’s right, wrong or indifferent someone should have to pay for the life that was takin, whether it be a human life and the life of an animal “IT’S STILL A LIFE”.
    Your judgement and opinion/beliefs of abortion is no different than the judgement and opinion/beliefs of people who believe the mothers at fault in this situation. We all have our own opinions and beliefs about situations and what’s right or wrong. It doesn’t make either side right or wrong.
    My concern is your lack of empathy and compassion for the animal species and your quick judgement of people who feel this mother is at fault. It’s people like you who scare me about society… Not the people who feel justice should be served.

    Reply
    1. Heidi St. John Post author

      Your position is the one that worries me. We elevate animal life above human life … forget that babies are murdered every day in this nation. All up in arms over … a gorilla. A majestic creature yes, but our priorities are waaaay out of line. My primary concern in the lack of empathy for human children. I’m not sure why that scares you. Where is the justice for the unborn? Where is their justice, Kacie?

      Reply
      1. Kacie

        Had you read my post throughly you would have seen that I stated “I don’t condone or agree with abortion”, but that also does not put me in a position to judge the choice or decision of another human being. Never once did I say I elevate animal life over human life… You are now putting words in my mouth. Just because I don’t feel that it’s my position to judge another human being does not make me have any less compassion or have a lack of empethy for unborn babies. I don’t personally know you but I’m not sure who put you high enough for you to feel it’s your place to judge the decision of others, last time I checked that was gods place. With that being said, that does not mean I have a lack of empethy or compassion… It means it’s not my place to judge. This topic is completely irrivelent to the fact that a gorilla was killed because of a parents inability to adequately supervise her child. Also, never once did I say that your primary concern “the lack of empethy for human children” scares me. Again, you are putting words in my mouth. If my position on having compassion for both animals and humans scares you then it seems like you’re the problem.

        Reply
        1. Lisa

          Kacie,
          You say that you do not put yourself in a position to judge another human being, really, not ever? Or just in the case of abortion? Would you judge a parent if they went into their babies room and smothered their child to death? Tell me, would you condemn that parent and demand justice for that life? The truth is, abortion is not much different. The difference is, one is legal! Have you ever read the procedure for partial birth abortion? Would you judge then? When do you start judging? When the baby is in the womb for 1 month? 2 months? 6 months? Ever? When does that human being deserve saving? I would say you are judging, by turning away and saying that baby doesn’t deserve to live because that mother said so. I get so sick of people saying that they are not judging if a woman decides to kill her baby! You are judging, you say loud and clear that a human life does not matter! Shame on you!

          Reply
          1. Kacie

            Clearly you are failing to read my post throughly. I stated and I quote “I don’t believe in abortion nor do I condone it but with that being said I don’t feel it’s my position to judge. As a child and family therapist I have worked with people from all walks of life. Have you ever put yourself in another persons shoes and thought for one minute what some people have gone through. Do you really live in a bubble where everything is perfect?! As a therapist, if I were to judge every person who has walked through my door with a shameful story or past, I would be doing both my clients and society an injustice to the service that they deserve. Have you ever heard a story so horrific and unimaginable that it made you sick and made you go home and hold your children a little tighter? Have you ever heard a story so horrific you laid in bed at night and cried just thinking about some of the stuff people have gone through? Have you ever sat across from a teenage girl who just had an abortion and listed to them tell you the story of the physical and sexual abuse she has gone through her whole life at the hands and mercy of her own parents, parents that would hold her down and let their friends rape her so the parents can get drugs. Parents that would starve her and beat her on a daily basis and straight out put her through living hell on a daily basis. A teenage girl who has been beat down and has absolutely no self esteem?? If you can honestly sit across from a 17 year old girl who already feels like the lowest piece of scum on this planet and tell her she is wrong for having an abortion when she got pregnant by her sexual abuser you are absolutely wrong. Did I have my own opinions about her parents? Absolutely, I am human, but in the moment it was not my job to judge her or her parents. She had enough strength to come face to face with me and tell me her life story, and tell me about all the times she thought it was easier to take her own life and the several attempts she has made to do so. Do I have my opinions? Yes, but it’s not my job to judge. I try to live by the saying “But by the grace of God there go I” until you have walked in another persons shoes and you have been in their living hell… How dare you judge. The thing about society and makes me lose all hope in the human race is people like you. Thank god above there are people who are willing to put their beliefs and opinions aside and still look at them like they are human. So you wanna know where you “draw the line” on judging another human being. You do what I do for a living and maybe you will that God above for the life you have and the blessings you may have that others don’t get the opportunity or luxury of having.

  35. Chris

    If you read the Articles explaining the lead up to the incident. They clearly explain that the child kept talking about wanting to go in the water and wanted to climb over the wall to play in the water and he was going to find a way into the water.

    As a parent would you not pay more attention to that child to make sure they don’t? Is it not their duty to be diligent at that moment? If not then, Then when?

    I understand that it is impossible to watch your kids 24/7. However, if my son kept saying, “I want to pet the lion, I want to pet the lion.” When I got to the lion exhibit I would certainly be very attuned to the danger that my boy may try something stupid even if I had talked to him.

    This mother did not just lose track of her child. She willfully neglected the situation. I think she should get prosecuted.

    This to me is no different from people that own guns and don’t secure them or teach their kids of the danger of mishandling firearms. If you have a pulse you know that there is inherent danger in having guns around kids. So you take steps to mitigate the risk. You teach your kids about the danger and you secure your weapon. You don’t set your gun down fully loaded in front of a child with the safety off and walk out of the room.

    This gorilla situation is the same thing. There were clear warning signs and this mother neglected them all. She should face some kind of consequence.

    Reply
  36. Kacie

    Clearly you are failing to read my post throughly. I stated and I quote “I don’t believe in abortion nor do I condone it but with that being said I don’t feel it’s my position to judge. As a child and family therapist I have worked with people from all walks of life. Have you ever put yourself in another persons shoes and thought for one minute what some people have gone through. Do you really live in a bubble where everything is perfect?! As a therapist, if I were to judge every person who has walked through my door with a shameful story or past, I would be doing both my clients and society an injustice to the service that they deserve. Have you ever heard a story so horrific and unimaginable that it made you sick and made you go home and hold your children a little tighter? Have you ever heard a story so horrific you laid in bed at night and cried just thinking about some of the stuff people have gone through? Have you ever sat across from a teenage girl who just had an abortion and listed to them tell you the story of the physical and sexual abuse she has gone through her whole life at the hands and mercy of her own parents, parents that would hold her down and let their friends rape her so the parents can get drugs. Parents that would starve her and beat her on a daily basis and straight out put her through living hell on a daily basis. A teenage girl who has been beat down and has absolutely no self esteem?? If you can honestly sit across from a 17 year old girl who already feels like the lowest piece of scum on this planet and tell her she is wrong for having an abortion when she got pregnant by her sexual abuser you are absolutely wrong. Did I have my own opinions about her parents? Absolutely, I am human, but in the moment it was not my job to judge her or her parents. She had enough strength to come face to face with me and tell me her life story, and tell me about all the times she thought it was easier to take her own life and the several attempts she has made to do so. Do I have my opinions? Yes, but it’s not my job to judge. I try to live by the saying “But by the grace of God there go I” until you have walked in another persons shoes and you have been in their living hell… How dare you judge. The thing about society and makes me lose all hope in the human race is people like you. Thank god above there are people who are willing to put their beliefs and opinions aside and still look at them like they are human. So you wanna know where you “draw the line” on judging another human being. You do what I do for a living and maybe you will that God above for the life you have and the blessings you may have that others don’t get the opportunity or luxury of having.

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    1. Lisa

      Yes, I am fully reading your post, and let me clearly say, just because you say that you do not condone abortion but will not judge, that is making a judgement! You are saying that those babies, for whatever reason you may justify, is ok for them to be murdered. I understand that sometimes there are horrific situations and therefore you can rationalize it, but I bet you wouldn’t rationalize it if the baby was out of the womb. That is making a judgment, that one life is worth saving and one life is not. And let’s face it, most abortions are not due to these heart-breaking circumstances like rape, incest, or abuse. I don’t condone even in those situations because to me a baby is a human being created in the image of God, inside or outside of the womb, but I think if we could get abortion restricted to at least that, that would save thousands of lives! But I think Heidi’s point was that so many are outraged over an animal’s life, and yes, that is sad, but it would be nice to see at least the same kind of outrage for human lives. Our society has their judgments backwards.

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  37. M.S.

    You are absolutely right. Scary to see the people who think humans and animals are equal in worth or that humans are “parasites” on this earth. God created this earth for man and calls us to multiply and replenish it. Though we are stewards over the earth, we are not to worship the earth as an idol and put it above those made in God’s image. And your connection between the outrage over a gorilla’s death and the lack of outrage over murdered infants is perfectly relevant, as evidenced by some of the comments on here. “We can’t judge abortion to be right or wrong?” Um, yes we can. God clearly tells us his stance on murder. Also, it doesn’t matter how endangered an animal species is–a child’s life is more important than all those animals. Priorities indeed. I’m pretty sure people’s priorities would change pretty which if they were the ones being dragged around by a huge gorilla!

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