When I began homeschooling some 18 years ago, I set out to have the best homeschool possible.
I read books on education. Lots of books!
I attended homeschool conventions.
I spared no expense on homeschool curriculum. Lots and lots of homeschool curriculum.
I poured my life out for my kids believing that it would produce excellence in them.
And then everything fell apart.
I’ll spare you the gory details but suffice to say that by neglecting my husband (he was a ‘big boy’ after all, right?) I was not saving time, I was undermining our whole family structure.
God describes the ideal family dynamic in Colossians:
Colossians 3:18-21: “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter toward them. Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing to the Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.”
Although adhering to these principles may go against our natural inclinations, well, they work!
When I put the needs and concerns of my husband over those of my kids, he is a blessed guy.
When my husband is a blessed guy, guess what? He wants to bless his family!
This is not meant to be a legalistic statement. You’re not going to hell if you neglect your husband.
You just may, however, experience a little bit of heaven if you do.
Here is what I mean. When I honor and bless my husband by putting his needs first, I may not get the house completely clean or finish that great, life-changing family read aloud on schedule. Honestly, this can bother me. I like to get my list checked off.
However, if I put aside these types of things, say by putting my kids to bed earlier, in favor of spending more quiet time with my husband, he feels important.
When my husband feels important and valued, he is more interested in pouring into our home and school. I find that he begins to anticipate my needs and help me in ways that I never would have asked.
Four Ways to Bless Your Husband Today
- Forgive his shortcomings quickly, just as you want your shortcomings to be forgiven.
- Stop what you are doing, ahem, and listen to him.
- Admire him for what he does well – let him know you appreciate him!
- Pray for him everyday. It isn’t easy supporting and leading a family.
As a young mom, I believed that the more I did for my kids, the better our family would be. Now I have come to understand that if I want the best for my family, I need to put my husband first by loving and honoring him within our home.
How about you? Have you seen a difference in your home by putting your husband first?