The New Face of “Hate”—and the Message of Grace

The Supreme Court is not the Supreme Ruler::it cannot redefine what God has already defined: marriage is between one mane and one woman.

My heart hurts a little today. Not gonna lie. Turns out that God’s word is unpopular. I have gay friends. I love them. I’ve never said an unkind word to them. I’ve never been rude, disrespectful or the least bit “hateful.”

However, apparently my stance that God created marriage and that His word is authoritative and inerrant on all matters pertaining to life and death has made me hateful.  As such, I have become the target for some truly hateful comments. People have said they wished I would die, called me a bigot, said that their god is “disgusted” with me. Several posters questioned whether or not I should be allowed to keep my “indoctrinating” my own children.  “I hate you!” one woman yelled in a Facebook post, “You should not be allowed to live in this country!” Shortly after that, another woman said I was the “most ignorant, hateful person she had ever encountered.”

Really? Does she not get out much? If I’m the meanest person she has ever encountered she should meet some of my social media “followers.”

 

In a breath-taking departure from the rule of law, the Supreme Court has mandated a new moral code for you. So how do we…

Posted by The Busy Mom on Monday, 29 June 2015

 

A few days ago, when our president colored the White House with God’s rainbow in celebration of what God calls sin, my heart broke. Like many of you reading this, I felt I could barely breathe.  It was an affront to the millions of people in this nation whose very souls ached at the sight—but more importantly, it was an affront to God.

As I was being publicly mocked for “sheltering” my kids via homeschooling them, the US Department of Education changed their Facebook profile to celebrate what God calls sin. As I have said before, education is never, ever neutral. In Luke 6:40, the Bible teaches us that when a “student is fully trained, he will be like his teacher.” And now, if you dare to disagree with the state teaching your children their version of morality—get ready—you’ll be called hateful.  I can almost guarantee it.  This is the new “tolerance.”

US Dept of Education makes their position on homosexuality clear

 

Listen. Can I just say again that I stand on the word of God? Shoot the messenger if you must, but one day, I’ll stand before the Lord and give an account of my life. I’m clinging to the only thing in this life that is true: the gospel. I have my own sin. I myself am in need of a savior; of His grace. It is ungrace to deny His power and saving grace in my own life. For me to not love other people would be an affront to the One who gave His life for me.  Lord! Help me to love like Jesus loves!

In my grief, I wonder: could it be that these attacks toward anyone who dares to hold to the authority of Scripture betray a deep longing for grace? I believe many who post such things live just beneath a thinly veiled search for grace, a desperate longing to be truly loved. We were created by God and for God … and love is here. Love won at the cross.

Because of the cross, grace is here. The message of the cross is grace; and in the same way I have felt personally wounded, it occurs to me that grace is just that—deeply personal. God’s grace abounds, even now. He rejoices when even one of his lost ones comes home.

Grace baffles those who have never experienced it. The world us the opposite of grace. The world, and unfortunately, the church is known for it’s lack of grace, not for grace. In this context, I understand why one man said I was “just like the Taliban.” He’s never experienced grace.  It’s hard to comprehend why or even how God could extend outstretched arms to us even in our sin. And yet, that’s what He does. He freely offers grace, mercy and forgiveness. He says, “I love you—and you’re wrong.” This is a dichotomy that is almost impossible to comprehend in our world.  Grace, God’s grace, is only free because God has paid the cost.

We cannot stop saying that grace is for everyone anymore than we can stop speaking the truth about sin.

This is the message of the cross: the hope and change this nation is looking for will never be found apart from faith in Jesus. This is where I stand, battle weary and bruised, wearing humbly the criticism that really is aimed at the cross of Jesus Christ. He gave His very life for me. I can do no less than proclaim His love and mercy until He brings me Home.

This entry was posted in Faith, Homeschooling, Marriage, MomStrong Parenting and tagged , on by .

About Heidi St. John

Heidi has been married to her husband Jay since 1989. Together they have seven children and three grandchildren! The St. Johns homeschooled their kids all the way through high school. Heidi is the the author of seven books, host of the popular podcast "Off the Bench," and the founder of MomStrong International, an online community of women learning God's Word and how to apply it to every day life. She and her husband Jay are also the founders of Firmly Planted Family and the Firmly Planted Homeschool Resource Center, located in Vancouver, Washington.

35 thoughts on “The New Face of “Hate”—and the Message of Grace

  1. Jennings

    So sorry. I’m afraid it’s just the beginning. While I have my FB page (the personal one) the most private it can be, and limit my friends to actual real friends, I still had to stay silent for a couple of days. Friends – Christian friends – on both sides. I stopped looking because I didn’t want to see another #lovewins rainbow smiley face profile picture. There were so many things wrong with the SCOTUS decision, on the spiritual and legal and governmental sides I honestly wouldn’t have even known where to start. I made one comment only on the whole things, merely about fearing for our country, which is now ruled by 9 unelected lifetime appointees, and got a bunch of likes from all sides of the debate. So I guess that’s something. The rest of my thoughts I’ll have to save for one-on-one conversations, because it is so easy for it to descend into just what happened to you – all about hate and bigotry and violence. I’m afraid our culture has passed a tipping point, and things will get much much worse from here on out. I’m so glad that I know Who wins in the end.

    Reply
  2. Storm Suitter

    To nobody’s surprise, of course.
    (Luke 6:22 “Blessed are ye, when men shall hate you, and when they shall separate you from their company, and shall reproach you, and cast out your name as evil, for the Son of man’s sake.”)
    It blows my mind that this world can cherish underdog, after underdog, but they shame faith in God’s word. Something I’ve heard over and over about Christians is that, “they should be accepting of all people, regardless of what they believe.” Does the same principle not apply to those that believe marriage is sacred between man and woman?
    I’m from Utah, so the hatred I see most is directed towards the LDS Church, but this is a good reminder that no matter the title, Christians need to stand together in this day and age and I really admire you for standing firm in your beliefs. I wrote a piece similar to this on my own blog if you’re looking for a like stance.
    Keep up the great posts! I hope these haters never get you down haha

    Reply
  3. Kathleen Lauser

    Dear Sweet Sister in Christ, your words were just I needed to guide me in how I was going to approach this subject with my 6 youngest kids that are still in “homeschool”. There have been challenges among family members with this topic, and the word of God is the greatest Love to shed light on the truth, yet many cower from the light, for it illuminates sin, which many are not yet ready to face. Thanks so much for following God on this, and I will be praying His wings will cover you. Stand strong, Friend, He will carry the weight of this, it is not too much, remember the burden that He has for you is lighter than the one you see in front of you.

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  4. Candice

    The world hated Christ, and they will hate us, too. I am trying to steel myself for the coming tidal wave, as we continue to stand for God’s truth. Take heart, Sister! You are not alone! Praying for you.

    Reply
  5. Ashley

    I just want to applaud you for standing firm and posting what you believe. I’m sure there are many many bloggers that feel the same way you do but don’t have the courage to say so.

    I am totally with you. God’s word is truth and the FINAL authority!

    You, dear sister in Christ, will be receiving a “Well done, good and faithful servant.” while the others are having to explain to The One True God why they supported this decision.

    I pray that every unkind word will slide right off your back and that you will find comfort and strength in the positive comments and in Christ’s love for you.

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  6. Amy

    Can you imagine if an American President lit up the White House with a cross? The rainbow White House made my head and heart hurt. I was ashamed of our country and how it has let down all those who gave their life to build it. I am ashamed with our focus. This world is full of civil wars, real persecution resulting in death, famine, disease, AIDS, Ebola, human trafficking, Terrorists, and the list goes on. And our affluent, entitled country is focused on gay marriage and calls Caitlyn Jenner a hero. I don’t hate homosexuals, nor do I want them to hurt, but please don’t force me to accept or celebrate their sin. Should we legalize heroin so the addicts don’t have to feel discriminated against? If it is OK to now say that we “identify as a man or woman”, then shouldn’t it be OK for anyone in this country illegally to simply say “I identify as an American”? Keep speaking truth in love Heidi! Our voices and choices are slipping away but I’d like to think we can hold on until Jesus returns, which has to be right around the corner!

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      Yes, we can hold on until our Lord returns—His grace will see us through. Stay strong in the power of His word, Amy! xoxo heidi

      Reply
  7. Christina

    Thank you for speaking truth and bringing such eloquence to a sometimes difficult subject to explain to children.
    Thank you for bringing the attention and the focus back to the One who loves us all. The One whose grace is amazing!!! May you and your family experience His perfect peace as you rest in Him.

    May our Lord Jesus Christ continue to give you the words to share and the courage to share them.

    In Him….

    Reply
  8. Noelle

    Just wanted to encourage one of my encouragers! Our family has moved a lot in the past 6 years so we do not have much community around us yet! I look to you and a few other bloggers as a source of encouragement and wisdom on homeschooling, mothering and being a good wife! Keep blogging and keep standing firm (I know you will!). What is frustrating to me is we have to accept, love and understand that people who are gay are gay, but what about accepting, loving and understanding we are Christian? Shouldn’t it go both ways? Unfortunately when we take a stand – even when in a loving way we are hateful! I have to keep reminding myself that ultimately God’s Word is truth and law and man’s law is driven by sinful people. He is in control and to keep our eyes on Him. I’m not saying anything profound, just want you to know we will pray for you and LOVE what you share, from your heart in love!

    Reply
  9. Heidi

    My husband and I were privileged to hear you speak at the Ohio convention in April. We think that you have been put here “for such a time as this” and that you are doing a fabulous job doing what God has called you to do. We will pray that you continue to be faithful, speak boldly, and uphold the truths of Christ – a loving, compassionate, just God, whose story the Bible tells. He will hold you up and your reward will be great.
    Thank you for your light in this dark world, sister in Christ!
    HUGS!!!

    Reply
  10. Barb Hahn

    Very well stated. Our leaders have lost sight that this nation was buit on Christian beliefs. I have lost respect for them allowing this to happen. It will be difficult to overturn the ruling, but maybe someone will get it done. God bless us and our nation.

    Reply
  11. Kristi Clover

    Thanks for sharing! When I saw your Facebook comment, I guessed you’d get some backlash. I’ll be praying for you. Sometimes being the light exposes pain. I’m proud of you taking a stand for our Wonderful, Loving Creator and His never-changing, infallible Word. Stand firm! 🙂 Blessings to you and your family. (I missed hearing if you guys have moved yet? Hope that it went well…or goes well) 🙂

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      Haven’t moved. Our house hasn’t sold and I’m working on a new book 🙂 so we’re going to stay for the time being. I sure appreciate your prayers if you think of our family.

      Reply
  12. vickity907

    Peace to you Heidi. The Lord will not be mocked. His day will come and we will be victorious. We must continue to STAND and KNOW this battle is the Lord’s and NOT against flesh and blood. As others have stated I too fear this is just the beginning.

    I am on my knees for this country. I fear judgement and wrath may be on it’s way as well. Until that day Keep Standing!!!

    Reply
  13. Cara Thompson

    This is a heartfelt and helpful reminder to stand for truth and live with love and grace. Thank you for your call to stand on God’s Word and trust His judgment above fearing the world and their judgments. I didn’t know that the Dept. of Ed and the president were using the rainbows to promote what has happened in our nation. Now I am even more troubled yet convinced that God’s way is the only way. He is the only trustworthy leader.

    Reply
  14. Christie

    I’m standing with you on the word of God. I imagine we’ll be seeing a lot more persecution for our beliefs in the coming years, but God is with us! I often think of that exact part of “My Father’s World” to encourage myself. Anyway, I’m sorry those posters were so rude to you. I’ve been listening to your podcasts for a few months now and I went to a few of your sessions at the FL Homeschooling Convention, and I think you’re awesome. You have encouraged me so much in my relationship with the Lord, my job as a homeschooling mom, and as a wife. Don’t let the haters get you down! 😉

    Reply
  15. Tennille

    I am so sorry you are going through this. I fear for my children as I am watching our world fall apart around us.

    I hurt for my young sons who will never know a world where traditional marriage is respected and Christian prayer is accepted in a public setting. Other faiths are tolerated and accepted while Christians have become the “Whipping Boy” of society, it truly saddens me.

    My sister-in-law is a Gay woman and while we love her we will be teaching our children that the Bible says her lifestyle is a sin. “Love the sinner not the sin” as my Grandmother always taught me. My husband also has a lesbian cousin who married her partner this past Saturday. We were invited to the “wedding” but declined on principle. Thankfully they understood and there were no hard feelings between us. While we love them, we do not support their choices.

    I think if we (those on both sides of the debate) could remember that we have the right to our personal views. And that we still need to respect others who don’t agree with us then this hate mongering would come to an end quickly.

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      Sounds like you’re doing what God would want you to do: love the sinner! Jesus was the ultimate example of speaking the truth in love. Keep in His Word and stay strong! I appreciate your comments, Tennille.

      Reply
  16. Cherie Thompson

    I liked a couple of your comments. For example “The church is known for it’s lack of grace.” But let’s get something straight. I’m a Bible believer. Sadly, the church has led most Christians into a skewed view of both marriage and how we should respond to homosexuals. You say you want to stand on God’s word. But do you even know what God’s definition of marriage is? It’s in Genesis and was repeated by Jesus. It’s a godly man and a godly woman choosing to be together witnessed by two (mother and father.) This is God’s definition of marriage. Until 1563 this was marriage in the U.S. Two people would choose each other, say “I marry you” and they were married. The government didn’t get involved until hundreds of years later. And why do Christians feel the need to get a certificate from a corrupt government to prove their morality to a holy God? Oh, and since when has God required us to prove our morality anyway? “…There is none righteous, no, not one:” Romans 3:10. Ceremonies are purely rituals of man. In the old testament dowries were exchanged, parties walked between the halves of slain animals to show their commitment to one another. But none of these traditions changed God’s definition of marriage. So gays wanting a certificate from a corrupt government in order to obtain the financial benefits shouldn’t cause us who are Bible believers to feel that marriage has somehow been denigrated by the gays. WE ARE ACTUALLY THE PROBLEM. We’ve defined marriage this way, not God. That’s as far as I’m going to go on that point. I could go farther. But I have another equally important point. When was the last time a fat person was confronted with Phillipians 3:19 “…whose God is their belly…”? when they walked into church. Yet for some reason we Christians feel that we need to confront homosexuals with their sin, as if God is unable. Other people, Christian or not, are given the freedom to seek God at their will. The truth is we are all sinners. God gives us the freedom to do this. If gays should not be allowed to marry, perhaps we should take all sugar, fat, and alchohol out of all of the grocery stores because “…know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost…” Do you see the hypocrisy? Don’t worry, you’re not alone. I’m so thankful that I do not struggle with homosexuality. It must be an incredibly difficult road. I can understand their hostility against Christians. Christians preach grace but secretly and sometimes not so secretly practice judgement. But this is not the Lord’s way. You have freedom to choose to sin or not and receive grace. Why should homosexuals be any different? And don’t say it’s because homosexuality is an abomination. I just don’t have the room to even begin to quote scriptures about the things the Lord hates beyond homosexuality. Proverbs 6 lists out seven of which many Christians are guilty. And don’t say it’s about how it affects the culture because I’m going to have to go back to the fat analogy. Don’t make me go back there. I’m a Christian mom. I don’t want my kids to be fat so I feed them right. I don’t want them to be gay so I teach them Biblical principals. But if they grow up to be fat and/or gay, I will love them anyways. God loves his creation too.

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      Hi Cherie! Thanks for stopping by. I think we’re saying many of the same things. All sin is equal in the eyes of the Lord and we have done (the Church) a terrible job of singling out one sin as worse than another… but they do carry with them different consequences. The main thing is that we obey the Word of God and live it out in such a way that it brings honor, not dishonor to God and to His people.

      Reply

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