47 thoughts on “Pride is a Terrible Houseguest: A Duggar PostScript

  1. oh so true. King Solomon knew this years ago; there’s nothing “new under the sun”…..why do believers grab on so strongly to methods and models of living created by fallible humans? good thoughts. thank you.

  2. You are so right! People tend to idolize men who are Godly. I’m Thankful for my Pastor and for the Great messages he preaches..but..He is not my #1 source to look to. The Lord Jesus and His Precious Word. It pretty much boils down to the pride thing!!

  3. This was so good. My husband and I are in ministry also and both come from a long line of ministry in our genealogy. We have always discussed our safeguards against the devil getting that foothold. We need accountability. We can’t ever think ourselves so godly that sin can’t ever find a way in. This was a great post. It also helped me know where to direct my anger towards the situation that came out last week.

  4. This really spoke to my heart! Reminds me something Darlene Zschech said about letting pride creep into our hearts: “It’s not a matter of IF it will hurt you, only a matter of WHEN…” God help us all…

  5. Terrific post for all of to read, Heidi. For me personally, I read it first as a wife, second as a mother, third as a homeschooler, fourth as a youth group leader (a position I serve alongside my husband as his helpmate), and lastly as a blogger and author. Thanks for sharing this – it’s appreciated!!

  6. Such a truth. Too many times as Christians we find ourselves worshipping a man instead of Christ. Hard to even admit that I am guilty of that. So important to keep Christ first and ask for wisdom and guidance. Thank you for this post this morning.

  7. Well said! When Jesus is overshadowed in any ministry, it’s doomed to fall. Your humility is admired, Heidi. Keep on keepin’ it real!

  8. “The proud make every man their adversary by pitting their intellects, opinions, works, wealth, talents, or any other worldly measuring device against others. In the words of C. S. Lewis: “Pride gets no pleasure out of having something, only out of having more of it than the next man. … It is the comparison that makes you proud: the pleasure of being above the rest. Once the element of competition has gone, pride has gone.” (Mere Christianity, New York: Macmillan, 1952, pp. 109–10.)

    Oh yes!! Isn’t that so true? It is a huge problem (I am including myself) among Christians. There was a talk given many years ago by (then) President Ezra T. Benson. It has become a great tool by which we can measure our pride. It has become a huge eye opener to me. I refer to it whenever I find myself forgetting to be humble. Quote: “Most of us think of pride as self-centeredness, conceit, boastfulness, arrogance, or haughtiness. All of these are elements of the sin, but the heart, or core, is still missing.
    The central feature of pride is enmity—enmity toward God and enmity toward our fellowmen. Enmity means “hatred toward, hostility to, or a state of opposition.” It is the power by which Satan wishes to reign over us.
    Pride is essentially competitive in nature. We pit our will against God’s. When we direct our pride toward God, it is in the spirit of “my will and not thine be done.” As Paul said, they “seek their own, not the things which are Jesus Christ’s.” (Philip. 2:21.)

  9. John 2:23 Now when he was in Jerusalem at the Passover Feast, many believed in his name when they saw the signs that he was doing. 24 But Jesus on his part did not entrust himself to them, because he knew all people 25 and needed no one to bear witness about man, for he himself knew what was in man.

    Im so glad we have a savior!

  10. Pride? Try god-complex. A feeling like you have a right to your life, for it to be comfortable, happy and exciting. When your life isn’t comfortable, happy, and exciting, we believe we have the right to make it that way ourselves. Listen to divorced people in The Body–“God wouldn’t want me to be unhappy” or “I married the wrong person.” No, we expect our lives to be what we want, and when God doesn’t deliver like Santa, we seek it out like a shopping spree on Amazon and get it delivered to the front door. The closer I get to Christ, the more I realize I have absolutely no right to direct the course of my life. I surrendered to Christ, let Him be in charge, threw up my hands and said, “Have Your way with me” and chose to be content with the Hope of Heaven instead of discontent with the uncomfortable, unhappy, dull life on this side. If you’re being abused, find a safe place to live your unhappy, uncomfortable, dissatisfying life and trust that your Heavenly Husband loves you. The Creator of the Universe, the God of All, the Perfect Lamb, loves you so much that from the cross He got down on one knee, opened eternity in a little velvet box and asked you to be His Bride for eternity. And when I compare the teardrop of this life to the ocean of eternity with Him, I can embrace with joy this life of discomfort–this mist, this humidity in the air–for however many years He deems I shall. Doug Phillips has no right to his life, and neither do I.

  11. I do believe Satan especially targets leaders because of their influence. So sad to hear when anyone is overtaken in a fault. I’m sure pride is involved as well, but we all have a measure of pride lurking in us.

  12. Yes…it’s so hard – seeing others who have a profound message, walking life with them and praying for them and their ministry – to see something like this happen.

    It can happen to anyone.

    We are all sinful.

    Me, I’m praying…and pondering…

    1. Hey sweet girl 🙂 I agree, it can happen to anyone but the signs of pride should not be ignored. I think we don’t want to acknowledge pride when we see it for fear of offending. This was the case in my family, and it seems as if again, this was ignored for far too long. Yes we are all vulnerable and we are all sinful—we all need accountability.

  13. I agree. I remember scrolling through a Vision Forum catalog about a year ago and seeing all the leaders, and especially Doug, accompanied by very innate sketches, as well as very carefully staged and edited photographs. I wondered if the ministry had became about a man, and it had.

  14. Thanks for this beautiful post we all need to hear and embrace this…..I too have fallen and have been restored and yes PRIDE is the foundation that begins the assault….seems we battle it daily to keep in check still….we will always need prayer and support from others. Not lectures. We know the word and a simple prayer, accountability and encouragement goes a long way. We wont return to the previous ministry position, but we minister to those who hurt from this sin that affects us all after we have been restored with a repentant humbled heart. I Humbly ask for love, prayer, truth and grace for those of us who have fallen in the years past but stand redeemed in the Lord Jesus, delivered and restored!

  15. I think we should all remember that It Could Be Me! when we are thinking about sin. It could be ME that cheats on my husband. It could be ME that takes discipline too far. It could be ME that has a child that goes astray. If we realize we are vulnerable…maybe we could do the things that are necessary to prevent a fall. Pride says, “It will NEVER be me” but humility says “It could be me!”

  16. Pride plagues us all, sin plagues us all and we all have to do battle with them every day. We are all serious sinners. We all know this. We also know that we are to judge no one. I’m just trying to figure out how the Duggars thought they could put themselves out for millions of people to see, including their 19 children, and not anticipate some kind of crisis arising. When you extol the virtues of your family and way of life for all the world to see, you may want to consider that you are, in a sense, “asking for it.” If the parents had not decided that it was their duty to advertise their way of life and entertain people (or even worse, believe that they could instruct the world by their shining example), then the family crisis they are experiencing (which happens in many families) would not be a national crisis or a crisis of Christianity in America, but rather a personal crisis. I really don’t want my sins to be a stumbling block for anyone else. If I put my life on TV every week, I can guarantee you, I will disappoint people, most of all myself. The fact that the Duggar family has to deal with situations like these (with their son) does not shock me at all. People struggle in life. The fact that they thought it was a good idea to put their lives in public, have cameras on their children for years, and try to communicate some message to the world that they have the answers to how life should be lived, that fact really puzzles me. I cannot imagine living my life in front of a TV camera. People make big bucks off this show. The Duggars’ lives became a show…a TV show that made money, and probably most of all for people who do not share their beliefs at all. They put their lives out there for public consumption. With 19 children, how can it be possible that things aren’t picture perfect? As just one person, I am so far from perfect. Really, the crisis began with the decision to turn their personal lives into a TV show. The only thing any of us can do is pray for enlightenment to see what sinners we all truly are and repent, repent and repent, and ask for the grace of God to heal us and help us grow. We can ask this of our Savior for ourselves and all people. May God have mercy on us all.

  17. Sisters in Christ, what I’ve seen in the past few weeks/months with the Duggars has brought great sorrow to my heart. But not so much regarding Josh himself. It’s how we as Christians are acting. Judging. Throwing stones, if you will. And it saddens me. How many times do we sin every single day? Pride. Check. Selfishness. Yes. And just when I think I have something “mastered”, it either pops up again or a new sin area is revealed in the Lord’s perfect timing. It is only by God’s grace that I haven’t fallen into “worse” sin. (Eph 2:8-9) But I have great hope and peace, for Jesus’ blood covers it all!

    If the Duggars felt lead to be a part of TLC, that’s between them and the Lord. Who are we to judge? Just because Josh’s sin was exposed through this doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. Maybe this is the only way it would’ve been exposed, to help Josh towards true repentance… Perhaps this is how the Lord is going to reach his heart… and other men struggling with similar addictions… Even though sin is sad and gross, I know God is going to continue to use this for good– for all of us! I am praying for them but also for myself and my own pride.

    And to those who have idolized the Duggars, it’s a good reminder that only Christ is our rock and only the Bible is our standard. All else is imperfect. We all fall short. As Heidi mentioned at a conference, this post, and I’m sure other places, it’s a good reminder that Christ is the only One to save us. Not homeschooling. Nor role-models… When we pick up any other book than the Bible (even godly ones that the Lord can use to grow us) we need to be on guard not to make an idol of that author. Don’t get me wrong, the Bible is clear that discipleship is a GOOD, godly thing. But be on guard.

    Let’s love each other, as Christ loves us. He’s using each of us for His purposes and loves all of His children. 🙂

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