Don’t Try {So Hard}

The other day, I heard Amy Grant’s new song, Don’t Try So Hard. It really spoke to me. In fact, her whole album (How Mercy Looks From Here)blessed me. It’s encouraging to hear someone else talk about how God is teaching them what it means to follow Him.  I loved the way Amy wrote about trying to please others:

Do you remember how the summers felt when we were kids
Oh we didn’t think much about it,
we just lived
Taking our time,
beautiful leisure
When did we start,
trying to measure up
And all this time, 
love has been trying to tell us

Don’t try so hard
God gives you grace and you can’t earn it
Don’t think that you’re not worth it

I don’t know about you, but I really don’t like to disappoint others. I think most of us are wired that way. I rarely meet a mom who is not an overachiever on some level. We all want to be the best mothers we can be. We want the best for our kids. We want to be the wife our husband dreamed of.

Several weeks ago, I had the privilege of meeting a mother of ten while speaking in the midwest.

She felt like a failure.  “Turns out, ” she said, “that the number of kids we have doesn’t equal godliness. Someone told me it did.”  We tried so hard to “do it right,”  she said.

It wasn’t that she was unhappy that they had ten children, either — it was just that years of trying to meet someone else’s expectation for her family had left her with very little margin in her life.

And, as it turned out, following someone else’s idea for what her family was supposed to look like was exhausting.

I know how that feels.

As a recovering people-pleaser, I could relate to her. We cried a little, standing in that hotel lobby.

We try so hard to “get it right…”

Dress like this. Eat like that. Listen to this. Don’t listen to that. Right way. Wrong way. My way… your way. 

It’s hard pleasing people.

Thank God, we don’t have to.

We just need to please the Lord.

In Galatians 1:10, we read, “For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.”

Am I seeking the approval of God or man? It’s a good question, isn’t it?

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Matthew 11:29 (NIV)

Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

Jesus gives us just three imperatives about how to do this thing called life:

  1. Come to Me. (Pray.)
  2. Take My yoke.  (Carry the yoke God has designed just.for.you.)
  3. Learn from Me. (Read the Bible, busy mom. God wants to speak to you.)

No need to keep up with the Joneses. No need to meet anyone else’s expectations.

Don’t try so hard.

God gives us grace for each day. We can’t earn it.

There is joy that comes from pleasing our heavenly Father.  It brings peace–and freedom. A freedom that comes from knowing that we’ve asked the Lord to direct our path. It makes everyone else’s path pale in comparison!

Spend time in God’s word, busy mom!  Seek Him every day.

Then, take His yoke. He wants to carry it with you.

Don’t try so hard.

Lean in. Press on. Live in freedom.

You are loved.

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*THIS POST CONTAINS AFFILIATE LINKS. THE SMALL PERCENTAGE I EARN FROM THESE LINKS DOES NOT ALTER THE CONTENT OF MY POST.*

Heidi St John Guide to Daylight

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About Heidi St. John

Heidi has been married to her husband Jay since 1989. Together they have seven children and three grandchildren! The St. Johns homeschooled their kids all the way through high school. Heidi is the the author of seven books, host of the popular podcast "Off the Bench," and the founder of MomStrong International, an online community of women learning God's Word and how to apply it to every day life. She and her husband Jay are also the founders of Firmly Planted Family and the Firmly Planted Homeschool Resource Center, located in Vancouver, Washington.

14 thoughts on “Don’t Try {So Hard}

  1. Maya Andersen

    I just get engouraged by Tour writing, thoughs and godly Wisconsin, thanks all the Way from Denmark 😉
    Love, Maya

    Reply
    1. Amy Morehead

      Thank You so much for this. You have blessed my heart. GOD has used you so much to help me. I also love the Amy Grant song “Don’t Try So Hard”. She is such a lovely woman. I can’t listen to the song without crying, especailly the part about being lovely even with your scars… wow !! Thank You Heidi ,God Bless You,thank You from the bottom of my heart ~ amy

      Reply
  2. Maya Andersen

    Oh my the spelling on the iPad is a challeng…
    Sorry…. I get engouraged by your writing… And godly wisdom….
    🙂

    Reply
  3. Heather

    Thank you for the timely reminder. I find it so easy to think I don’t have time to read my Bible, but I forget that God and His Word are my source of life.

    Reply
  4. Stacie

    I’m a recovering people-pleaser, too. Something about my first-born self!

    After our meeting, the girls kept singing that song (well, the only words they know…”Don’t try so hard.”)

    Reply
  5. Sarah

    I had never heard of Amy Grant’s song until I read your post on FB. Then, today as I was driving home from church, it came on the radio! Maybe the Lord is trying to tell me something! 🙂

    Reply

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