We Never Thought We Would Have a Big Family

BigFamily

Years ago, I vividly remember being in the grocery store when a young mother walked in with *gasp* FIVE (yes, I counted) kids. Two were walking beside her, one was holding on the the front of the cart, one was in the cart seat and she was wearing a baby. I thought to myself, “THIS is why people used to stare at me!”

I smiled at her. She had no way of knowing that it was the smile of a mother who really did understand the grace that was over her for that trip to the grocery store. I was on a rare trip to the store by myself. She didn’t stop long enough to see me smiling. My guess is that she is used to people looking at her. I get that, too.

Once, when I was young and free, I imagined my life differently.

In my imagination, I saw a few gorgeous children (maybe three)  with my stunningly handsome husband and maybe a bird or a cat. But not both. I was nineteen when I married the stunningly handsome man. He thought a cat was a good idea.

We began to imagine life together. He and his rock-n-roll band, me and my secretary job. And our cat.

When I was twenty-one, a little “+” sign told us life was going to change. Six months went by and then—she arrived. Twenty-one hours of labor was worth it. She arrived—all pink and smelling of the flower that some soul who understood had named for new babies. That was the first time I realized my that my heart was capable of a dug-down-deep kind of love. It was also the first time I understood why they named that delicate, sweet flower “Baby’s Breath.”

Two years and three months later, after a difficult pregnancy—a beautiful second daughter arrived. The life we imagined was starting to take shape. Our little white house with the drafty windows and no insulation was just right. We lived on a pastor’s salary and learned that garage sales were just as good—no—better, than department stores. (We still feel that way, these 24 years later.) We got a set of bins from Target and started to save the clothes our children grew out of: newborn, 3-6mo, 6-9mo, 12mo, 24mo… toddler.

The bins were small. We put them in our small, poorly insulated attic.  Sierra wore her sister’s hand-me-downs. Handsome husband (still in a mullet) played in his rock-n-roll band on the weekends. When he was away, I had our two little girls. And a cat.

Our imagining was turning into something.

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Three years later, after I begged and pleaded, my husband decided that maybe, just maybe—another baby was not a bad idea. He had just one sibling—I came from a family of seven children. Our imaginings were different. So we compromised. He thought four was a nice, even number. Soon, another “+” sign appeared on an EPT test.

We moved into another little white house. This time, we bought it.. right behind McDonald’s. (The smell of hashbrowns in the morning still makes my heart smile.) We loved our little white house with the damp basement. We fixed up our little fixer-upper, trying our hand at the DIY life.

In July of that year, our son was born. We beamed. Our hearts grew to make room for this little boy. He made us so proud. We added new bins of clothes to our growing bin collection. I wrote in Sharpie on them: “BOY – newborn. BOY: 3-6mo…”

Our next pregnancy found us at a new pastorate, in a new town. After a few weeks of keeping our secret, we made the announcement: we were going to have four children. This was back when we cared what people would say. Happily for us, most of the comments we received were kind.  It wasn’t too weird to have four children, we thought. Our imagined life was changing as we prepared to grow again.

About the time we thought we were in the “safe” zone, I went in for a routine ultrasound. I was alone when they told me what every mother hopes to never hear. The image on the ultrasound screen was not moving.  I heard words like “non-viable” and “miscarriage” in that dark room.  That day I learned a new lesson: each day is precious. Anything can happen. There are no guarantees.

Two years went by before our next son arrived. His birth was sweet, but followed by a terrifying amount of blood loss. Recovery was long and hard, but oh—he was worth it. His smile was captivating. We fell hard for this one.  The loss of our last baby seemed to amplify the joy he brought. We thought we knew it before, but now we knew it in a new way: Life is precious.

With the addition of our fourth child, we decided that we were complete. No more babies. Life was getting busier all the time. Birthday parties, homeschooling, more laundry… just more of, well, everything. An uncle gave our daughter a lizard for her birthday. “Leopard geckos are less maintenance,” he said. Contained. Less needy. Except for the crickets.  I never imagined myself with a lizard—but she loved “Milo” and we made a little more room. Lizards are cool, I found out.

Just about the time we were feeling like our family fit into a nice, neat little American “category,” we got a surprise.

We call her “Summer.”

I’ll be honest: we were not planning on going over the number 4. Five children meant that we would not fit into a regular booth for six at Red Robin. In meant our car was too small. It meant people would start staring at us and ask us ridiculous questions like “Do you know how that happens” and “Has anyone explained that to you?”

I cried. I really did. I was only thinking of what other people would say—what they would think. I wasn’t thinking of how rich we were becoming. I’m a planner. It wasn’t in our plan to be a “big” family. Since we had chosen to homeschool our children, I knew this ratcheted things up about fifty notches, and honestly? I didn’t know if I could do it.

Summer arrived in the spring of 2003. (We like telling her that.) She fit her name, with beautiful blue eyes (all the others had brown eyes) and blonde hair. The familiar newborn cry filled the air when they handed her to me. If I loved her before, it paled in comparison to how I felt when our eyes locked. Who would turn down such a precious gift? 

And so, we were seven. We made room in our hearts and our home for another precious gift, and with that gift, our hearts were changing. Maybe—just maybe, all those people who would count our kids and stare at us in Costco, maybe it didn’t matter what they thought at all.

Meanwhile, our house was becoming, shall we say, a little on the “not quiet” side. Not gonna lie. Things were a little more challenging with five kids. It took longer to go places. More dishes. More laundry.

More love.

More bins. We learned to live frugally—because the children were worth not having a car payment.

In late fall of 2004, Jay spent some time in Russia with members of a Christian band he was playing with. In August of 2005, our little “Russian souvenir” was born. And yes. We planned her. Something had happened in our hearts. We were grateful.

Life moved on. Toddlers became teenagers who loved their baby sisters and toddlers. Life became even busier. We added a parrot to our menagerie. We had two lovebirds as well. Side note: One of them attacked the other one. I don’t know where they get that name. Love birds are anything but “loving.” (You’re welcome.)

In 2009, I wrote my first book. “The Busy Homeschool Mom’s Guide to Romance” was my heart on paper. In it, I said that I thought we were done adding to our family. You can imagine how many times I have been teased about that. I’m thinking it’s in the neighborhood of a million—because, in 2010, we were given one last, precious child.

Our oldest daughter had become a beautiful high school senior. She graduated when I was pregnant. It was a surreal feeling to graduate her knowing that we were soon going to start all.over.again. My heart was full—and so was my closet. With bins of clothes, photo albums, shoes, receiving blankets, nursing wear.

In 2010, just a few weeks before Christmas, our seventh child was born. She was the answer to a prayer we didn’t know we would have when we were young and “free.” We never imagined our hearts could hold so much love. I also never imagined our dishwasher could be run so many times in a day or that the house could be so noisy or that kids could bring me all the way down to my knees—and that God would meet me there.

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Is it easy? Absolutely NOT.  Are we doing it perfectly? No. But we’re so glad we’re doing it.

It’s now 2020. Four of our seven are grown now, and a fifth is getting ready to graduate from high school. We have three grandkids—and expect many more to grace our family in the future.

It’s been a few years since we imagined our life from the inside of our little white house. I never planned to have a big family, but love changed my mind. Love does that. Love finds bins on sale. Love makes you strong.  Love changes your perspective. It helps you see past what’s temporary to what’s lasting.

In the fall of 2013, our childbearing years came to an abrupt end. Our season of bringing children into this world is over. I’m glad we didn’t listen to the naysayers. I’m glad we exchanged our small, cute car for a 9 passenger suburban with a bench seat. I love it that our kids have so many shared memories. I love that the chances of me spending my twilight years alone are next-to-zero, because that rock-n-roll boy of mine and I hope to be surrounded by our children, grand-children and great-grand children.

And yes. I’ll happily look you straight in the eyes now and say without hesitation, “YES. They’re all ours!”

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This entry was posted in Homeschooling, MomStrong Parenting and tagged , , on by .

About Heidi St. John

Heidi has been married to her husband Jay since 1989. Together they have seven children and three grandchildren! The St. Johns homeschooled their kids all the way through high school. Heidi is the the author of seven books, host of the popular podcast "Off the Bench," and the founder of MomStrong International, an online community of women learning God's Word and how to apply it to every day life. She and her husband Jay are also the founders of Firmly Planted Family and the Firmly Planted Homeschool Resource Center, located in Vancouver, Washington.

70 thoughts on “We Never Thought We Would Have a Big Family

  1. Oldwell

    Thank you for sharing your story! I read your blog often and have wondered how you came to have seven. I have so much respect for all mothers, but I really admire mothers who have more than me and am fascinated by their stories. I am currently having a hard time accepting that my youngest of three is 5 and so mature these days. Lately I have thought we shouldn’t have stopped at 3 and I miss having a snugly toddler. I imagine that feeling is the same whether you have 1 or 7! I am so grateful to be blessed with my boys.

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      Yes 🙂 That feeling is the same even with seven. I’m so glad to hear from moms who love mothering! Even when it’s hard—it’s good. ((hugs))

      Reply
  2. Hannah

    Life is funny isn’t it? My husband and I dreamed of a big family. Five, six, seven kids sounded perfect to us. Life though had other plans. Eleven years of infertility and so much help from fertility doctors, it would make your head spin, we were blessed with our son. He has brought so much joy and love into our home. I don’t get the “are they all yours” questions but I get my fill of “only one?” questions. While I don’t have the huge family I always dreamed of, I do have an over abundance of love in my sweet family and for that I am eternally thankful 🙂

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      Love this, Hannah. I love your heart, too. It shines. We make our plans, but the Lord directs our steps. I appreciate your perspective. Blessings!

      Reply
  3. Erin

    Hi Heidi,

    I love that your blog celebrates motherhood. I have had my fill of blogs that complain about how hard parenthood is. I often talk about how hard it is on my blog but I always talk about how much I love my kids and how it’s worth it. I came from a family of two and always thought I’d have two as well. Well we lost my first pregnancy and that forever changed me. I too got the lesson that life is precious and it’s stayed with me. After my second child I thought great. I have a boy and a girl I’m done. A few years later I felt my heart longing for another child and after a LOT of prayer, God changed my husband’s heart and answered my prayer for a third. As I’ve lost more and more family I see how valuable it is to give my children the gift of each other. They will have each other long after their father and I pass away.

    God bless you!

    Reply
  4. vickity907

    Make. ME. CRY. I just love this. We set out with the glimmer in our eyes that we’d “someday” have a family and after 8 years of infertility God Blessed us with one son. We were thrilled. I laughed at my 6 week check up when my doc said that I should be careful and I said “If the Lord has more for us bring it”. So after $10,000 and IVF to get our son here. God Blessed us with another son a mere 11 months later. We again we thrilled and since then God has blessed us with 3 more kids all conceived the “old fashioned way”. I too never had any idea this is how my life would turn out but…. I love it. And with each new addition, there’s a learning curve, a new rhythm that a mommy has to learn. I looked in the rear view mirror the other day in my “church van” and it look my breath away. 5 little heads(9 and under) all staring back at me.I can’t imagine what life would be if just one were missing. Each one is a blessing. I get the question all the time…. Aren’t you done having kids yet? I just say. When the Lord says I’m done, then I’ll be done. It’s ALL up to him. But secretly… I’m hoping for a least a couple more!Thanks so much for this one Heidi!!!

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  5. Shannon

    Oh…I love this. It’s becoming our story, also, though two of ours were adopted – the dreams, the fruition, the miscarriage, the sudden all-too-vivid understanding of the sanctity of life, the calling, and the surprise, which came for us just last month when we saw two lines on that little test that we never thought we’d take again. 🙂 This will be our seventh at home, too. Thank you so much for sharing your story.

    Reply
  6. Christine S.

    This made me cry. I have three precious, beautiful children…but I can’t have any more. I’m only 31, my youngest will be 5 in January. When we got married almost ten years ago, we dreamed of a house that was overflowing with love and children. I’ve mourned that loss, and I’ve accepted that this is God’s plan for our family, but somedays I wish for what I don’t have. God bless you for sharing your heart! And for being proud to say that, yes, all of these children are yours.

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      ((hugs)) Christine. Thank you for sharing your story. I have a friend whose story is similar to yours, and they ended up adopting. Keep close to the Lord! He’ll comfort and keep you. I appreciate you commenting!

      Reply
  7. Ericka

    Loved the article. We have 3 girls 3&4 (twins are 4). My husband would love to have one more (the boy) secretly I would like two boys. LOL!! I get the are they all yours comment with the 3. I am trying not to care what others will say because I am closing in on 40 rapidly. I pray that God will favor us, but in the mean while thanks for the encouragement. God Bless!!

    Reply
  8. Leslie

    What a timely post. We just found out that we are expecting #5. Technically, it’s my ninth pregnancy. So we have a 50/50 chance of carrying this baby to term. After so many losses, we have decided to just trust The Lord with His perfect timing. Our heads are spinning as we think of the logistics of having a big family. (We have four, ages 1-6 so this will make five 7 and under.) Sooooooooooo busy and crazy and messy and LOUD. But oh the love. And JOY! I am cherishing these moments as best I can. And just laugh A LOT. 😉 Thank you for writing and sharing. And being real. Your words have often reached right off the screen and touched my heart. From one homeschooling, busy mom to another…THANKS! 🙂

    Reply
  9. Sara

    Thank you for sharing your heart Heidi! i so enjoy reading your thoughts! We have 4 kids and i used to care what others thought of our family choices, now love has changed me also! i actually was embarrassed to be pregnant with our 3rd and hid that pregnancy from friends and family for about 4 months, and there were still people that didn’t know until i was 8 months pregnant! oh how silly i was to worry about offending someone by bringing another blessing into the world. after we had our 3rd, i was changed for good! now when people have comments i nod and smile tell them my heart is full and mentally throw away their negative comments. there are a handful of wise very encouraging souls out in the world that offer encouragement and affirmation…i hold onto those comments knowing that God is planning our family! i’ll take the stares and gasps knowing that i can fix my eyes on what is ahead!

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  10. Carolyn M

    Thank-you for sharing!
    And I love the timing. Today is the birthday of #5,
    had it been up to us, we would have stopped at 3 or 4, but God nudged and today we are celebrating the 17th birthday of our first son. Can not imagine life without him, or his three younger siblings. 🙂
    God is good.

    Reply
  11. Sara King

    Wow. This is so…. us. We didn’t plan to have a big family. But here we are with 7 children, ages 10 months to 13. We graduated to a Suburban with #6 and converted the front seat to a bench with #7. We get the “stare” and the comments and I wish I was able to tell each one just how awesome our unplanned big family really is.

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      Woo! Bench seats are the best! 🙂 My husband was loathe to drive a 15 passenger van, but we do it when we’re traveling and speaking. One more child and it would have been our full time vehicle. Merry Christmas, Sara!

      Reply
  12. Julie

    From the bottom of my heart, thank you for this post. I’m in the stage of motherhood where I have two kids who are three and under. Some days, I feel like none of us will survive it and I can’t fathom why God gave me a longing and deep desire when I was just a kid myself to have a “big” family. I question why I would still have lingering feelings that it’s my destiny to be a mom to many when there are SO many circumstances that seem to be shouting that we can’t possibly have more kids. I just needed a little piece of hope…and that’s what you gave me. I’m going to try to have a little more patience and keep holding on. And we’ll see what happens. 🙂

    Reply
  13. Emily J

    I read this as my fourth baby is kicking away just weeks from her due date 🙂 I just tucked my older three into bed and thought how wonderful it is to be a mother! I also thought how I don’t want this to be my last pregnancy… I just LOVE our family!! Thank you for sharing your story… big families are BEAUTIFUL!! And so full of love!! Your words have reminded me of what’s truly important 🙂 God Bless!!

    Reply
  14. Kailey

    We currently have 4 beautiful children and I have found myself thinking the exact same thing as you did. My life is full, our car is full and our home is full. In the past few months, God has been encouraging me to reconsider. In some ways He has outright said Kailey, I have other plans. He is asking me to take a step of faith and trust Him that He will provide what we need along the way. I have a heart full of fear but the Lord is asking for trust and this post could not have come at a better time. Thank you for sharing that you did not feel entirely joyful as God changed your plans but you give me a vision of what God is building and that is enough hope to outweigh the doubt. God bless your family and your ministry and Merry Christmas.

    Reply
  15. Evelyn

    Thank you for this story! I definitely can identify. We had 3 children about 2 years 9 months and 3 years 9 months apart (with a devastating miscarriage in between). We were considered a “normal” family back then. We chose homeschooling when our oldest was in 3rd grade and our 2nd was in 1st grade. We were no longer quite as “normal”. 5 years after our 3rd child was born we began the next “out of the ordinary” phase of our lives. God blessed us with 3 more babies fairly close together! We became one of those large families that gets the stares at the grocery store and has trouble finding a table big enough in a fast food restaurant. My oldest is a senior in college now, my 2nd just got married, my 3rd will graduate high school in May, and I’m dreading having just 3 left at home. I already miss the baby and toddler stages and all the commotion that goes with 6 children under the same roof and life in full swing. I can’t even imagine a world without my wonderful blessings!

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      It sounds like we are living parallel lives, Evelyn. 🙂 I know what you mean about missing them. No matter how many you have, the time goes by fast. Keep soaking it up with me. <3

      Reply
  16. Heidi

    What a great post! Made me get all teary, but that’s to be expected with me right now. I’m about 11 weeks Pregnant with our 6th and feeling so sick and tired in the evenings. I keep telling myself that we shouldn’t have any more, but I know from previous experience that I change my mind frequently. 😉 This was good for me to read. May the Lord bless your family as you do His will by sharing your stories.

    Reply
  17. Taneil Lawton

    Thank you so much for your post. I have 7. Number seven was born this year on my 38th birthday. I have told people that I would be done at 8 or age 40, but the Lord has been working on my husband and my hearts and simply asking us to trust him. Thus we are now on a ride of trust not knowing what the Lord might do. The Lord has really showed me that I fear what people will say more than I trust him for the size of my family. I pray that now I am simply trusting and I truly am ready to let Him decide how many blessing HE wants to give us.

    Reply
  18. Danielle

    I loved this post! What a beautiful celebration of motherhood! I was always adamant that I won’t have kids, since I had abusive parents and grew up in a war torn country. Why add more victims to the pool of sorrow?
    But God had other plans for me. He sent me a husband in my thirties, at the age most people are already married with kids. I agreed to have our first baby just to please God. Little did I know that I’ll end up having three wonderful boys, and I wish sometimes I was younger or in a better shape to have a couple more. But I guess I already have three beautiful little miracles to take care of! They totally changed my view of God and mankind. Although I know that mankind is capable of the worst, what I saw almost my entire life, I remember when I see my gentle kids that mankind is also capable of the best, and that God is King, no matter what. I trust Him to guide me in raising my little boys, despite the fact that I have no idea how to raise a normal family. I just let Him be in control! Bless you for your ministry, Heidi.

    Reply
  19. Kelly Crawford

    Beautiful, Heidi. And so painfully/joyfully true. Time goes fast. My first child just married. There are nine others. And I am reminded, as I try to take in the surrealness of watching her kiss her new husband, to slow down, gaze a little more purposefully into the eyes of my children and truly count each day a blessing, though fleeting into the next.

    Reply
  20. Diana

    Thank you for sharing, Heidi! We just had baby #4. Two years ago, we decided that we would be open to however many children the Lord wanted to give us, and this baby is our first “intentionally unplanned” child. It was the best decision we ever made, and my one regret is that it took us ten years to come to that place of openness to God’s blessing. I will always regret the decade that we decided to reject God’s blessings and only welcome them in our timing.

    Looking forward to hearing you at AFHE this year!!
    Diana

    Reply
  21. Noelle Friese

    I have not read the whole article yet, I am sure it is awesome, going back up to read the rest. But I thought…..oh my goodness she saw me at the store the other day, ha, ha, ha! You described me perfectly….oh wait, OK, not perfectly! It would be more like I had two walking beside me, one jumping all over acting wild (our dear, dear middle child who is 5 and still working on self control), one in the seat whining, “I’m HUNGRY” while trying to suck her thumb and one in the Ergo trying desperately to escape since she has decided to learn to walk at 9.5 months! My kids are not that perfect at the store, ha! It wasn’t me but at least I KNOW now I’m NOT alone when going out in public and causing a scene. Now that I’ve actually typed this without being interrupted, I’m going to go finish reading! Thanks for what you do, your encouragement almost always comes in perfect time!

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      Noelle, I love your heart! Thank you for chiming in. I’ve always said that I’ve never met a mom who was sorry she had “just one more” but I’ve met plenty of moms who wish they could’ve had another baby. We need to keep encouraging families—because we know the blessing and the struggle! They go hand-in-hand. It’s worth it. ((hugs!!))

      Reply
  22. Noelle Friese

    AWESOME!!!!! Thank you for writing this…you have such a beautiful family. Thank you for sharing your heart and your story so we can be encouraged. I wrote earlier because most of the time I start and never finish things… but I got to finish tonight and I am so grateful. My sister just asked the other day, “You two know how that happens, right?” I said, “Yes we do!” I would never change our crazy busy life either – well maybe a little – mom could be a little more organized and prepared so I didn’t always feel SO behind! But other than that I love our life! Our oldest is getting married in Feb. and our youngest is turning 1 in Feb. and their great-grandmother is turning 100 in Feb. What a fun month that will be – memories that will be worth far more than anything else! Again – Thank you for doing what you do!

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  23. Christy Mullis

    I’m thankful for your story–especially today. You see I’m a mother of many also and after several years of no negativity from others concerning our large family yesterday was a downer. My hubby was asked to lunch by a new church member who asked him had I considered having my tubes tied and joked that he would take up an offering among the men to pay for a vasectomy. Later on the evening my hubby called a close family member wanting advice about a possible job change and he also cut with his words. He said perhaps we had exceeded the faith level to have this many children. My husband was crushed. Judgements are so prevalent concerning every walk of life these days. Thank you for your encouraging story. God is writing ours and we love our nontypical journey. Our oldest is 22 and we are due with #9 mid march. God bless you all.

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      NON-typical is good these days, I think. I read your comment to my husband..he relates. Keep holding your head high! You will not be sorry!

      Reply
  24. Beckey

    It’s so encouraging to hear stories of big families. Thank you for sharing. We haven’t been out a lot with all of ours because of our baby’s medical needs, but when people hear that I have 5 kids and ask if they are all ours I tell them that they are all ours by birth and adoption. Four kids seemed to get the “Your hands are full” response ( and they are full! Full of love and crazy days). Five just seems to shock people. We’ll probably have more so I wonder if the reactions will change again.

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  25. Katarina

    I am always baffled by the notion that anyone could have an opinion about how many children someone else should have. Too many opinions! That is my opinion! ; )

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  26. Amy

    this was such a blessing to read. I have 7 as well and we get stares, comments. the comments from the church is what hurts the most. I loved to read your story. I just subscribed to your blog a few weeks ago and it has been a joy. Thanks for sharing your life story.

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      I’m so glad to hear that, Amy! Welcome to my crazy, online life 🙂 You’re right—it’s the church comments that have a particular sting to them. ((hugs)) from one busy mom to another!

      Reply
  27. Angela

    I remember meeting you at a woman’s tea when you were expecting your last baby girl. You looked like a hot, hip mama! And I thought, “wow, she makes seven kids look good!” 😉

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  28. Shernette

    This was interesting…I have only four and the multiplication of everything is overwhelming. But as you said children are precious and it seems with each one came a greater capacity to love.

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  29. Lisett

    This could not have come at a better time. As I just 1hour ago found out I’m expecting #5!!! Very scary and exciting all the same time! Mixed emotions! Please keep me in prayer. My oldest (of all girls) is 7yrs and youngest is 15 months =) thank you for this!

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  30. Shauna

    I am 11 weeks pregnant with # 7. We haven’t told the kids yet. Thought it’d be fun to see how long we could keep a secret this time. OK, I’ll be honest…we just aren’t ready for the “comments” from others quite yet either. I, also, never dreamed I’d be pregnant as my oldest daughter graduates this May! We are excited but those overwhelming feelings come often. Thank you so much for this post! Ours all start with “S” too! 🙂 Merry Christmas!

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      Congratulations, Shauna! Don’t let other people steal your JOY… shout it from the rooftops! You’ve been blessed. ((hugs)) and Merry Christmas to you!

      Reply
  31. Rosie

    Loved reading this. Super similar story to my husband and I actually. We have seven, 5girls then 2 boys pulling up the rear. 🙂 Thanks for sharing and being real.

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    1. Heidi Post author

      Thank you, Rosie! I’m glad I’m not alone on our crazy, big family adventure! 🙂 Those two boys are going to have a lot of brothers someday. #getready

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  32. Charity

    Thank you for sharing this. I’m sitting here crying and stressed because our youngest of 4 is 9mo old and I am mostly likely carrying her baby brother/sister. I haven’t tested yet because I am scared….your post encourages me though….I know that if we are having another baby he/she is a gift from God.

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      ((hugs)) to you, sweet Charity! God sees you. It will be worth it. I have been in the mommy trenches and I am praying for you and for the precious gifts you have been given. Thanks for stopping by my little home away from home here at the blog. xoxo

      Reply
  33. Kendra

    Heidi……. I’m so grateful I met you at the homeschool conference. And now reading this… I cried- because our stories are identical so far. We lost baby #4 when we thought we were safe, and now we have 4 children here with us and our hands feel full- giving birth 5 times in 5 years is God working. We’ve mentioned “maybe we’re OK with being done” and we keep begging God for absolute direction. Because I’m with you: if I saw that “+” sign I would probably cry…. I’m so exhausted with so these wonderful blessings- being in the baby stage again (youngest is 6 months old) is not getting easier.
    But I’m finding that it’s purging the absolute sin outta me.
    It’s changing me

    Reply
    1. Heidi Post author

      Love this, Kendra! Kids are definitely part of the sanctifying process, aren’t they? Blessings to you, sweet friend!

      Reply
  34. Elise

    Hi THERE, Just reading these awesome commentaries. I highly applaus Large families…
    …I stopped at two. youngest being 13months. I still have trouble and pain down-there, I’m scared to tear my body apart if we’d go for another one. I’m 34, and want to wait at least one year to see where I’m at phisically.
    Besides that, the thought of being pregnant again and the months after birth scares me. Giving birth has been the fun part.

    Now to me all this feels like: birthcontrol is not oké and I should Trust in God and go for a Large Family and Let it all happen, but that’s for couples who actually live in Faith right?

    I’ve Read someone dating she prayed for het husband to want another baby as well…
    …I dont feel like praying since I feel No Desire to have another baby (yet?).

    I don’t want to get in Gods way.
    Any thoughts or feedback on that is appreciated.

    Reply
  35. Michelle

    When I first started reading this post I though oh she seen me at the store haha. We didn’t start out with the intentions of being a large family either and never even gave homeschooling a thought. Five blessings later we have started a homeschooling journey this year and are excited about what lies ahead. It’s so great to read other people’s perspectives and see how they have handled what we are walking through. Thank you for sharing your story!

    Reply
  36. HEATHER POWELL

    Thank you so much for your encouragement. I currently have 6 children with one on the way. My husband and I lost 2 babies in between our 1st and 2nd child, which really changed our perspective on what a gift each child is. The kids are now 10 and under. I am often overwhelmed, but I love hearing stories like yours! We kind of have a unique living situation right now. My husband is an active duty Army soldier, and we live on a tiny post in AR, with only one toddler who lives on our street. There are only 4 other houses on the entire base, so we are pretty isolated. We are also part of a tiny church plant. All that to say that we have very few friends and even less encouragement . I have been ashamed to go into Wal-mart lately, in fear of all the looks we get and comments that we attract. After reading your post, I am newly encouraged to stop caring about what people think and instead look to what God says. Thank you soooo much! Bless you!

    Reply
  37. Erica Hernandez

    Hello, I loved your story. I had my 24 yr old at a very young age of 15. Not because I was out if control but because I was trying to get out of an abusive hm and planned on my little one; he saved my life more than I ever imagined! After he was born I worked, became a single mom, went back to school to graduate finished my degree as well and had my son graduate high school and college. Along the way, I remarried of course, tried for more children but had many losses; devastating and gave up hope. Twenty 24 yrs later God had a different plan for us and sure restored my faith when we were blessed with our son!We were thrilled and I would have loved a big family. Now I’m 39 w/a 24 yr old & a 13 month old; I’ve been told the most negative things about having children older than 40. I sure have been back and forth on trying on just 1 more which my husband is all for it. I would have loved my big family yrs ago but it just was not happening, now I’m not so sure with all the ugly negative comments I get..

    Reply

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