The “Myth” of Socialization

Heidi St John Homeschooling Guide to Daylight

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About Heidi St. John

Heidi has been married to her husband Jay since 1989. Together they have seven children and three grandchildren! The St. Johns homeschooled their kids all the way through high school. Heidi is the the author of seven books, host of the popular podcast "Off the Bench," and the founder of MomStrong International, an online community of women learning God's Word and how to apply it to every day life. She and her husband Jay are also the founders of Firmly Planted Family and the Firmly Planted Homeschool Resource Center, located in Vancouver, Washington.

5 thoughts on “The “Myth” of Socialization

  1. pat

    I think that this would apply if it was only you and your kids and no socialization involved at all other than the family. Sure you would see other people/family on holidays/birthdays etc but if you dont have people close by then I totally disagree with him. For me it was so as we moved to the country and tried to get involved in a group but it became hard when others did not want to socialize because we were of a different race and I find it hard FOR my girls because they were the ones who suffered because of a lack of proper socialization. I find when you become involved in other members of other families that it helps to even out the “oddness” of what is right and wrong in how we relate to others. Getting involved with other members of society in a good way makes a big difference in their outlook but if you are a Christian it makes it easier because we have God and godly members of our smaller society..I could go on and on but I also agree somewhat in that if you do become involved no matter what the obstacle, persevere that is and go forward that it could become a “myth” but I am not sure exactly what he means..just saying from my point of view..

    Reply
    1. heidistjohn Post author

      Pat, thanks for your comment. I always tell parents that their kids will be “as weird as they are”. Isn’t that the truth of parenting, no matter how you educate?

      I think the argument here is that “proper” socialization is not found in the hallways and classrooms of traditional school. It’s simply a myth that children need to be around other children all day long to understand how to function in society. That teaching should come primarily from their family … first their parents, and then peers.

      Reply
      1. Rebecca Emmons

        I agree with how you express yourself here, Heidi. One of the contradictions of public school socialization is that large numbers of equally “uncivilized” children are compelled to spend time with each other, and it is impossible for a teacher to give sufficient one-on-one attention and training to proper social behavior when she is also keeping all the students on-track with their work and dealing with any other distractions that arise. So “Lord of the Flies” is much more like students’ school experience than teachers may want to acknowledge. Kids create their own hierarchies, their own rules, their own “law of the jungle,” and if a parent isn’t very involved in their child’s life (if the child isn’t talking to their parents about the issues that come up in school), it’s nigh impossible to provide the proper training. How do we get “grown ups” when we’re modeling so much of our behavior on our peer groups and their limited knowledge and experience?

        Reply
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